getting cold out here in az…59 at night and im wearing a sweatshirt this am…i got soft i know… alicia says jacquie is all around… i tried getting a picture of a tinkerbell on a bike in tempe near asu…there were three or four people riding bikes in bizzare costumes…i think they werent costumes cause they looked like…too close to real clothes and “normal ” for them…anyway went to see richard gere/diane lane movie last week with amy…argh chick flick…but there was a trailer for a tinkerbell movie coming out soon…she is all around and you dont even have to look hard… peace to the hirches and all the jacquie believers
Jacquie, tears…they are so tough sometimes but they are also good because I know they mean that you and your family just mean so much to me!! Sharon, mom and I saw a sign for Friday’s “kids eat free on Tues.” can you imagine tha place on a kids eat free night escpecially here in NM. I asked my mom “maybe Sharon can accompany us to a kids eat free night in Bflo sometime”…not!!! We shall go and pay full price to avoid that crowd.Tee hee. I loved your moms message about the woman with the tink pants and her smiling. That was a cute story. Love to you- holding your hand! Sara
so after my Dad passed away, I think one of the hardest things for me to deal with and to grasp, was that I kept on thinking how long it would be until I could be with him again… I kept thinking “I have to go the rest of my life without seeing him again,” and thinking of it that ways seems like the worst eternity ever. I also remember wishing for it so badly to be a year, 2 years, 5 years from that time because then I knew the pain wouldn’t be so severe… at the same time however, I didn’t want a day to pass because I knew that that would mean it has been one more day (another eternity) since I had seen my dad, spoken to him, felt his touch, breathed in the smell of him, etc. etc. With Jacquie’s passing I am dealing with all of these same issues… however Jacquie is really doing a brilliant job at showing me that although we all have to wait the rest of our lives to be reunited with her, and to “see” Jacquie as we all know her, she is actually letting us see her in a different way everyday now! So although I can’t see her beautiful face in front of me, as I said yesterday, I see her in so many things… and even though its not nearly as good as the real, actual thing, it is a bit of a condolence knowing that I can still see parts of her everywhere I go. And one thing my Mom always said to me after my Dad passed was that the way I remembered my dad (his face, body, form etc.) well that was just his body, not actually him… because we are made up of so much more… we are our spirit, our soul. So when we see these pieces of Jacquie all about, even though we aren’t seeing her face or body, we are seeing the most important things: her soul and spirit. i love you all so much, and Jac, I love you soooooooooo much.xoxoxo <3 alicia <3 xoxoxo
Sunny days seem to hurt the mostWear the pain like a heavy coatI feel you everywhere I goI see your smile, I see your faceI hear you laughing in the rainStill can’t believe you’re goneIt ain’t fair you died too youngLike a story that had just begunThe death tore the pages all awayGod knows how I miss youAll the hell that I’ve been throughJust knowing no one could take your placeSometimes I wonder who you’d be todayWould you see the world?Would you chase your dreams?Settle down with a family?I wonder, what would you name your babies?Some days the sky’s so blueI feel like I can talk to youAnd I know it might sound crazyToday, Today, TodayToday, Today, TodaySunny days seem to hurt the mostI wear the pain like a heavy coatThe only thing that gives me hopeIs I know I’ll see you again somedaySomeday, Someday I love you with all my heart and I miss you very very much. I’ll see you again someday.
Jacquie, many tears, many smiles, many thoughts and emotions when I think of you, which is so often.Sharon, Your updates always touch my heart and I appreciate all that you write and share and how you remember each and every moment and detail. You were amazing and you still are amazing… but I know that is not what you want, you just want your Jacquie. That is what I would want as a mom. Not only is Jacquie continuing to share and teach us all how to live life, you are too and you are doing it so well considering what is going on in your world. Jacquie is proud of you, I believe that. You will always be “Jacquies Sharon” in our family out here in NM. Missing you so much and wishing I was not so far away. Hugs to you, Torey and Tj and a smile to you Jacquie!! Love, Sara
Sharon, Torey and TJ, My thoughts and prayers are with you every single day. Each day as I look at my purple bracelet on my wrist or the Tinkerbell decal on my car, I am reminded of the amazing person that Jacquie proved herself to be. Sharon-it would be an understatement to say Jacquie was lucky to have you as her mom and best friend. Not only were you there when she was sick, but you were there her entire life supporting her in everything she did. I can’t remember how many times you were like “oh i just made a drive to Geneseo.” I still remember sitting in the gym with you one day talking about how Jacquie joined a sorority. All you cared about was that Jacquie was happy and doing what was best for her. You were like a mother to all of us on the gymnastics team and will always have a special place in my heart. I love you Sharon!!
another cold and dreary day, yuck. sharon i just read what you wrote a few days ago about your what ifs. it’s as you told me a few weeks ago. you do what you think is best for your child at that time, and i do believe that you did everything you could for her, as you do for everyone by writing on here. and i also believe that jax is looking down on you and the family and everyone and helping everyone in her own way. she’s never far from anyone’s thoughts and wishes. i tell savannah about jax and how amazing she was, and about her tinkerbell smile and laugh, and she wants to be tinkerbell for halloween (savannah). she has reached so many lives, we will probably never know the full extent of all she did here, but it is great and far reaching. as always we love all of you, and are always here for you.
To love means loving the unlovable. To forgive means pardoning the unpardonable. Faith means believing the unbelievable. Hope means hoping when everything seems hopeless Stay strong, I love you Jax 🙂
Loving and Believing always. Thinking of you every second, all of you, Sharon, Torey, TJ – the extended Jacquie family and forever Jax. Love you all, <3 Sadie
Hello dear Hirsch family, First of all I just wanted to tell you all the I love you dearly, and pray for you each and every day. Secondly, Torey, I just wanted to let you know that if there is room, I would like to donate a beautiful dark purple lilac to The Park in the spring when we get all our our plants in…I am having one set aside at work for my home, and hope you would accept one for your park as well. They bloom in May, and I thought it would be a perfect reminder of a beautiful life. Secondly, I gave my grandmother who is living with cancer Jax’s poem, and she LOVED it and was proud that Jax had written it. Dad and I are planning a trip to see you all soon. I have to admit, I miss you all so much and wish I could give you a hug each and every day. Hang in there, and remember that God makes us strong. I keep forcing myself to go to church because I have so little faith left and it seems so hard, but each Sunday, it seems as though my pastor is telling me it will be okay and that things will get better. I can only continue to believe in faith, and believe in the power of Jax. I hope you can do the same. God bless you, Casey Jax, I’m subbing in kindergaten on Friday. You better BELIEVE that I will need your help, and will thinking about you ALL day…I’ll do my best. I love you, and I feel you with me each and every day. Fly high beautiful, fly high. ps…EEEEK!:)
Sharon and Torey-I can’t thank you enough for coming today. I know it meant a lot to the girls for you to be at the Senior Meet, and for Torey to give the Senior Speeches. Sharon- thank you for keeping your promise. I don’t imagine it was an easy thing to do. I know for Megan, this day wouldn’t have been complete without her gymnastic “parents” sharing it with her.XOColleen
Sharon…I just read your entry and my heart dropped! The same thing happen to me, fever everything, I was in the hospital for 4 days and on iv antibiotics at my house with visiting nurses for 30 days. Did Dr. Shanoy (not sure of spelling) put the line in?? I am so sorry for what you have been through! Jacquie and you sure were strong!!!
I am constantly keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers. I only wish there was something more that I could do for you from Geneseo. On Friday, there is a group of students that are putting on a bake sale in Jacquie’s honor, so there are flyers with her beautiful picture everywhere on campus. Its a wonderful image to see everywhere I go advertising for this event.I truly hope that you are finding comfort in knowing that Jacquie is at peace now, and in hearing all the amazing stories that people have shared with you. I know that the pain you are feeling is something that I will never fully understand, but just find ease in knowing that I am thinking of you always and always praying for you.Keep your head up. Hirsch’s I love you always. I know that everyone has been saying this, but please let me know if there is anything that you need. <3 Mindy
Sharon, I have been thinking and praying for all of you. I was reading some of your entries and want you to know that in the time I spent with Jax, she knew you were doing everything “right” so that she had the best chance at beating her disease. She was able to rest easier and relied on YOU to do all the “right” things so that she could concentrate on getting better. I love you and know that you did everything that any mother would have done for her dear and loving daughter. I am here if you need to talk, cry, or just be hugged.
Hello Hirsch’s, Strangely i was going through my old highschool notebooks that i have (clutterbug that i am) and keep everything! I was reading my old creative writing journal from the spring ’02 that stated Jacquie Hirsch was my best friend and i wrote a story about us being in a parade together, it went on and on about how wonderful she is and how she makes me laugh and is the perfect person to lead in a parade with! Very amusing and i should probably copy it and send it on here instead of writing ABOUT it but my creative writing skills were never that great and i would be way to embarrissed to do so. It made me laugh and remember how much fun we had in highschool..i also came across the numerous cards she sent me in the college years and am so thankful to have had a friend who cared so much about me and that i cared about aswell, enough to even be my parade partner! Never to be forgotten- she will always be with all of us forever:)
Sharon, Okay so I know we live in Buffalo, but seriously snow already. I think Jacquie is up there laughing her rear end off that we are down here running around getting our gloves and scarves and boots ready while she’s up there having a blast. I love you. Always Believing. XoxoxoxoAshley
max, it seems you are having trouble posting on the website… but someone on here explained to Ali (lil lil) how to do it from a mac, and she told me. so i’ll tell you. don’t use safari, instead use mozilla firefox, and then you should be able to do it! (i am assuming your problems are stemming from using a mac and not a pc. i could be wrong.) hope this helps!
Mrs. Hirsh I had read what you wrote on Oct 14th, the doubt of you decisions the uncertainty of all the what ifs.. All I can pray and hope for you is to find peace in all that you have done and tried to do for your daughter and continue to do. Your an amazing Mother, Jax was blessed to have had you by her side watching out for her, guiding her, protecting her, encouraging her. Had you done things differently and the outcome the same you would of still wondered what if. There are NO ifs in the fact that YOU AND YOUR FAMILY did everything that you could of done and continue to do so in her spirit and honor. How you all helped her and others is an inspiration and blessing. I Thank You for having been able to witness the love, support, encouragement and strength of your family.
My Precious Jacquie, I think I found a soulmate for Aunt Sheryl’s “Tinkerbell shorts lady”. A couple of days ago I was going into Tops and I met a lady coming out of the store. She was “amply endowed” and was wearing a bright lime green sweatshirt. Then I saw Tinkerbell on her left “ample endowment” and I must have gotten a big smile on my face because the lady gave me a big smile and seemed glad that I liked her sweatshirt. I guess I gave her a little lift and I’m glad. Thank you for finding ways to help us smile through our tears. I miss you more than there are stars in the sky or grains of sand on the beach and I love you forever, my precious Granddaughter. Your Bree.
the weather is horrible today: windy, dreary, and bitter. and every song on pandora is reminding me of you. like angela, today is a bad day for missing you. everything seems to be that much more painful when i think of you. ughhhhhhhhh. that’s all i feel like i can say sometimes. ughhhhhhhhhh. i miss you. i love you. but i do see you everywhere. you are in everything around us and you will live on through that. If I see a tree that reminds me of you, you are living on through that tree; when a song reminds me of you, you are living on through that song; you live on in everything Tink; every single time I see or hear the word “BELIEVE” you are living on in that. The list could go on and on and on. I miss you so much beautiful girl. Soooo many things I want to tell you.. but I just have to remind myself that you already know. i love you so much beautiful girl. without a doubt you are the most beautiful person, spirit, soul etc. that any of us have ever had the privilege of meeting. <3 delisha <3this one song just played on Pandora and everytime I hear these lyrics, they of course remind me of you and the pain we all feel and the struggles we are all enduring in the wake of your loss: "and I have the sense to recognize that I don’t know how to let you go." I love you. I miss you. I will be watching for the stars tonight, as I do every night. xoxo
today is a bad jacquie day! i am really really missing you bad today jax!!!!! i still dont believe it is real sometimes i think i am gonna get to see you again and then i remember your not here! i miss you.i love you. i will always, love cousin angela
Sharon, I can’t think of the right words to write this morning, I don’t know why but I’m having trouble. I thought about writing to you how I’ve been babysitting my cousins all weekend/week and my cousins are constantly talking about Jacquie. Donald hardly knew Jax but he still thinks of things to say about her. He even includes your whole family in his nightly prayers. I thought about writing how much I miss Jax and miss visiting her and talking to her and getting her insight or hearing her gossip. I thought about writing how much I believe a Mother will always be with her daughter no matter how far apart they are. But I just don’t have the words today…I love you and only hope that the pain you are feeling isn’t too bad today, I hope you get to hear or remember a funny Jacquie story and smile. Always always always believing, Ashley
Hello Hirsch Family, Thinking of you today like I always am. I was thinking about believing today… I know that I still believe but I was thinking about what that means. I used to list the things I believed for Jax to read and I think I should do that still. It’s shifted a little bit now – for the past year through Jacquie’s fight I believed so strongly in so many things… the biggest of which that Jax would get better. We all did. I guess what I have to grasp is that Jacquie is better – she is okay and she is free. I guess I never thought that her getting better would leave us all so empty but it has because she’s not with us anymore. I still believe… I certainly believe in angels, and in heaven, I believe in faith and I believe that Jacquie is sending us signs. I believe in the power of love and most of all I still believe in Jacquie. I believe that she wants us to keep going to keeplaughing for her and to keep crying for her to keep smiling when we think of her even if it also breaks our hearts. She wants us to keep holding on to each other and to keep fighting because I still believe that this stupid effing disease can be beaten and we – Jacquie’s Army – is going to help that happen. This sucks – it is horrible and painful and there is a big hole in our hearts… but even with all of the pain, I know I still believe and Jacquie helps me everyday to keep believing even more. She is not gone. I love you guys and think of you constantly. I hope I get to see you soon. Always Loving and Believing, <3 Sadie
Sharon,... I hope you made it through B.J.’s says:
I am missing Jax an extra lot today… Like many others I see signs of Jacquie in my everyday life… there is a little girl at the school that I work at that wears a tinkerbell shirt at least three times a week. Although it cant be sanitary how much she wears this shirt (haha) I know that it is her favorite one, and it brings a smile to my face and makes me think of Jax every time I see that little girl. I miss you so very much Jacquita… especially today for some reason, maybe that means your having an extra fun day up there. Love you and missing you always. Hirsch’s I pray everyday that although it seems impossible, this will somehow get easier for you. Take comfort in those around you and in the fact that Jacquie made an impact on this world and was so loved. Love Mel Cook
I saw this quote on a knick knacky sort of thing and I loved it and wanted to share it with you:”I believe if I try hard enough I can fly. Even if I never do, it’s believing that matters.”i love you all so much. xoxoxo<3 alicia <3p.s. michael, I saw this woman make meatloaf sandwiches last week on the TODAY show and thought of you & jac. maybe that can help you spice up your lifeless loaf of meat. (ew, said that way, meatloaf sounds even less appetizing! haha)
Sharon, Torey and TJ,Today I thought of Jacquie all day. My roommate and I are organizing a bone marrow drive at her school (University of Illinois in Chicago) and so we spent our day hanging up fliers. Although it was cold and rainy here I could feel Brace’s warmth with me as we went from building to building. I can only hope that our drive will help some family avoid what you are going through. I still believe.Love,Liz
Hi Hirschs and Believers! Jax-I hope you enjoyed the performance that we put on for you this weekend at BW alumni weekend! It was tons of fun…but it just wasn’t the same being in Geneseo without you (especially the IB)! TJ (Uncle Mayo)-It was so nice seeing you! You still dive pretty great for an old man too! Miss you already! Sharon & Torey-Just as I had previously woke up and prayed that it would be a good day for Jax, I now wake up and hope that you will have a good day, because I do believe that every day is a good day for Jax now. All the best!
hello…and a hug from az…had meatloaf last night…it doesnt have the punch that it used to, but I will always think of Jacquie when I have a well mixed pound of ground beef formed like bread with a string of ketchup (or catsup for you others) down the middle… nothing says “I gave up on making dinner” more than meatloaf… a piece for you Jax…
good morning!! just wanted to let you know that im thinking of you AGAIN like always this morning jacquie! aunt sharon and unlce torey it was so nice to see you on sat and tj thanks for meeting me on friday for lunch…i miss you guys too so it was nice to get together! i love you always, cousin angela
Dear Sharon,I read your updates, and my heart breaks for you. i can not imagine your sorrow. Know that other hearts, break for you…know that other hearts, want to carry your pain… I hope that helps lighten your load. Marlene xo
Dear Sharon, The word “BELIEVE” seems to be everywhere now. Or maybe now I just look at the word differently. I cant even count how many times I see it in a day, but after each time I do, I think of Jacquie’s courage and strength. The same courage and strength you are demonstrating daily. Know you are in my prayers. Believing in you Missy
Sharon, Torey and Tj, Know that I am thinking and praying for you all everyday. Tj-it was so nice to see you this weekend, I had a good time. Jacquie was so blessed to have such a kind, thoughtful, older brother, and she knew it! Good job diving too! Jacquie-I miss you so much and think of about you constantly. So many things make me think of you and what an amazing person you are. I love you and miss you. Stay strong and keep believing, love ~mandz
Hello Hirsch’s. I was just listening to a song that ive heard a bunch of times, but I made a strong connection to your family this time through. Its called “Hear You Me”by Jimmy Eat World. Im not sure if I hear Jacquiie saying the words or one of you to her, maybe even a combination: There’s no one in town I knowYou gave us some place to go.I never said thank you for that.I thought I might get one more chance.What would you think of me now,so lucky, so strong, so proud?I never said thank you for that,now I’ll never have a chance.May angels lead you in.Hear you me my friends.On sleepless roads the sleepless go.May angels lead you in.So what would you think of me now,so lucky, so strong, so proud?I never said thank you for that,now I’ll never have a chance.May angels lead you in. Hear you me my friends.On sleepless roads the sleepless go.May angels lead you in.May angels lead you in.May angels lead you in.And if you were with me tonight,I’d sing to you just one more time.A song for a heart so big,god wouldn’t let it live.May angels lead you in.Hear you me my friends.On sleepless roads the sleepless go.May angels lead you in.May angels lead you in.Hear you me my friends.On sleepless roads the sleepless go.May angels lead you in.May angels lead you in. The purple lyrics arfe what stood out. What I want to say about it is this: Its very hard, but you need to have confidence that everything happened just as it was supposed to. There wasn’t anything more for you to do, you did all and more than was needed. May the Angels lead precious Jacquie in, and may the angels (Jacquie too) Lead you to peace within. Don’t live in regret, but rejoice in the many wonderful things that happened in such short of a time. Sing for Jacquie tonight, as i’m sure she will be singing alongside you. May peace be with you, Hirsch’s. Love Joe Browning
Hi Sharon- I was moved by what Indie wrote because she put into words some of what I have been feeling…it will take time, lots of time and Jacquie was taken way too early and young- I don’t understand it, I probably never will as there is no reason or answer; but I agree with Indie and what TJ believes…that we need to keep doing what Jacquie loved, believed in and live life; keep her memory alive. I do believe she will be smiling and guiding all of us. She undoubtley has the strength and ability to guide and to be an angel and fairy to all of us. I am hoping right now she can guide you, TJ and Torey and give you extra strength and courage during the most roughest of moments. I am thinking about you!! Love, Sara
Sharon, Torey and TJ, Just wanted to let you know that you are in our thoughts everyday. We all wish we can take some of your pain from you. It is so funny how many things can happen in 1 day that brings Jax to mind. She has made such an impact on everyones life. That is the kind of person she was. She will forever be with us. We will all continue to help you fight for her cause. Love and miss you all. Jax we do still “BELEIVE” and will continue to fight !
Family: I wanted to tell you that Jax is always in my thoughts. My brother bought be a tinkerbell key chain just to remind me of her. Hang in there! Jax would want you to take every day and to never waste a minute of it. She is looking down, and I know she wishes she can come back down and to talk to you again, but she cant, and you have to believe that she wants you to be happy, and if your happy, she is happy. Stay strong guys 🙂 -Natalie M.
Dear Sharon, Torey and TJ, I think of you every day, and like you, I feel the anniversaries. Even going to NYC, hearing about Sloan represents Jacquie. For Anjalie and Ryan it’s a song that plays on the radio or a memory of when you were here. I believe Jacquie is with us and when we have moments of calm, we can feel her and she does come to us, in a dream, in a symbol in a feeling. All 3 of you had gone to the ends of the earth to help and care for Jacquie, so not for one minute should you doubt your actions. They were all the right ones to do. Should she have been given more freedom, more and earlier pain, complications could have occurred and you would have said, for what had I allowed this! I do know that Jacquie would want us all to live and love as she had done so wonderfully! We will need time to do this as she would wish. She was taken from us suddenly and too young, this is what makes it exceptionally hard for us to understand. We may never understand the why, but we can understand her gifts to us all and the good she has brought to so very many people. We need to take her beliefs/lessons and apply them, that would make her so happy and bring everlasting meaning. We love you all and wish healing and comfort for everyone!
Sharon, Torey & TJ, The other day, I was walking my dog with my boyfriend and I saw this little girl on her front porch. She was a beautiful little girl with golden blonde hair. She had on a pretty purple dress-up dress and a set of fairy wings. When he saw us and stopped what she was doing. Then she smiled, such a big, beautiful smile, then she started to sing a pretty song to herself. I looked at by boyfriend and said “Jacquie Hirsch lives on”. I wish and pray you all weren’t hurting so badly, but how could you not be. I don’t think there is one of us out here that knew Jaq that didn’t think “why not me!”. Jaq had it all! And hopefully she can heal your hearts from heaven….hopefully soon. Much love and hugs, Kate
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Michael Stoughton says:
October 24, 2008 at 9:13 am -
getting cold out here in az…59 at night and im wearing a sweatshirt this am…i got soft i know… alicia says jacquie is all around… i tried getting a picture of a tinkerbell on a bike in tempe near asu…there were three or four people riding bikes in bizzare costumes…i think they werent costumes cause they looked like…too close to real clothes and “normal ” for them…anyway went to see richard gere/diane lane movie last week with amy…argh chick flick…but there was a trailer for a tinkerbell movie coming out soon…she is all around and you dont even have to look hard… peace to the hirches and all the jacquie believers
Sara (albuquerque) says:
October 23, 2008 at 7:25 pm -
Jacquie, tears…they are so tough sometimes but they are also good because I know they mean that you and your family just mean so much to me!! Sharon, mom and I saw a sign for Friday’s “kids eat free on Tues.” can you imagine tha place on a kids eat free night escpecially here in NM. I asked my mom “maybe Sharon can accompany us to a kids eat free night in Bflo sometime”…not!!! We shall go and pay full price to avoid that crowd.Tee hee. I loved your moms message about the woman with the tink pants and her smiling. That was a cute story. Love to you- holding your hand! Sara
alicia says:
October 23, 2008 at 12:37 pm -
so after my Dad passed away, I think one of the hardest things for me to deal with and to grasp, was that I kept on thinking how long it would be until I could be with him again… I kept thinking “I have to go the rest of my life without seeing him again,” and thinking of it that ways seems like the worst eternity ever. I also remember wishing for it so badly to be a year, 2 years, 5 years from that time because then I knew the pain wouldn’t be so severe… at the same time however, I didn’t want a day to pass because I knew that that would mean it has been one more day (another eternity) since I had seen my dad, spoken to him, felt his touch, breathed in the smell of him, etc. etc. With Jacquie’s passing I am dealing with all of these same issues… however Jacquie is really doing a brilliant job at showing me that although we all have to wait the rest of our lives to be reunited with her, and to “see” Jacquie as we all know her, she is actually letting us see her in a different way everyday now! So although I can’t see her beautiful face in front of me, as I said yesterday, I see her in so many things… and even though its not nearly as good as the real, actual thing, it is a bit of a condolence knowing that I can still see parts of her everywhere I go. And one thing my Mom always said to me after my Dad passed was that the way I remembered my dad (his face, body, form etc.) well that was just his body, not actually him… because we are made up of so much more… we are our spirit, our soul. So when we see these pieces of Jacquie all about, even though we aren’t seeing her face or body, we are seeing the most important things: her soul and spirit. i love you all so much, and Jac, I love you soooooooooo much.xoxoxo <3 alicia <3 xoxoxo
Anonymous says:
October 23, 2008 at 11:12 am -
Sunny days seem to hurt the mostWear the pain like a heavy coatI feel you everywhere I goI see your smile, I see your faceI hear you laughing in the rainStill can’t believe you’re goneIt ain’t fair you died too youngLike a story that had just begunThe death tore the pages all awayGod knows how I miss youAll the hell that I’ve been throughJust knowing no one could take your placeSometimes I wonder who you’d be todayWould you see the world?Would you chase your dreams?Settle down with a family?I wonder, what would you name your babies?Some days the sky’s so blueI feel like I can talk to youAnd I know it might sound crazyToday, Today, TodayToday, Today, TodaySunny days seem to hurt the mostI wear the pain like a heavy coatThe only thing that gives me hopeIs I know I’ll see you again somedaySomeday, Someday I love you with all my heart and I miss you very very much. I’ll see you again someday.
Sara (albuquerque) says:
October 23, 2008 at 12:34 am -
Jacquie, many tears, many smiles, many thoughts and emotions when I think of you, which is so often.Sharon, Your updates always touch my heart and I appreciate all that you write and share and how you remember each and every moment and detail. You were amazing and you still are amazing… but I know that is not what you want, you just want your Jacquie. That is what I would want as a mom. Not only is Jacquie continuing to share and teach us all how to live life, you are too and you are doing it so well considering what is going on in your world. Jacquie is proud of you, I believe that. You will always be “Jacquies Sharon” in our family out here in NM. Missing you so much and wishing I was not so far away. Hugs to you, Torey and Tj and a smile to you Jacquie!! Love, Sara
Karen Hartman says:
October 23, 2008 at 12:04 am -
Sharon, Torey and TJ, My thoughts and prayers are with you every single day. Each day as I look at my purple bracelet on my wrist or the Tinkerbell decal on my car, I am reminded of the amazing person that Jacquie proved herself to be. Sharon-it would be an understatement to say Jacquie was lucky to have you as her mom and best friend. Not only were you there when she was sick, but you were there her entire life supporting her in everything she did. I can’t remember how many times you were like “oh i just made a drive to Geneseo.” I still remember sitting in the gym with you one day talking about how Jacquie joined a sorority. All you cared about was that Jacquie was happy and doing what was best for her. You were like a mother to all of us on the gymnastics team and will always have a special place in my heart. I love you Sharon!!
Lauren says:
October 22, 2008 at 11:20 pm -
Life just isn’t fair… 🙁 love you jax & family <3
The Keilly’s says:
October 22, 2008 at 10:56 pm -
another cold and dreary day, yuck. sharon i just read what you wrote a few days ago about your what ifs. it’s as you told me a few weeks ago. you do what you think is best for your child at that time, and i do believe that you did everything you could for her, as you do for everyone by writing on here. and i also believe that jax is looking down on you and the family and everyone and helping everyone in her own way. she’s never far from anyone’s thoughts and wishes. i tell savannah about jax and how amazing she was, and about her tinkerbell smile and laugh, and she wants to be tinkerbell for halloween (savannah). she has reached so many lives, we will probably never know the full extent of all she did here, but it is great and far reaching. as always we love all of you, and are always here for you.
Natalie Maranto says:
October 22, 2008 at 10:41 pm -
To love means loving the unlovable. To forgive means pardoning the unpardonable. Faith means believing the unbelievable. Hope means hoping when everything seems hopeless Stay strong, I love you Jax 🙂
Sadie says:
October 22, 2008 at 10:31 pm -
Loving and Believing always. Thinking of you every second, all of you, Sharon, Torey, TJ – the extended Jacquie family and forever Jax. Love you all, <3 Sadie
Casey Stiokas says:
October 22, 2008 at 10:28 pm -
Hello dear Hirsch family, First of all I just wanted to tell you all the I love you dearly, and pray for you each and every day. Secondly, Torey, I just wanted to let you know that if there is room, I would like to donate a beautiful dark purple lilac to The Park in the spring when we get all our our plants in…I am having one set aside at work for my home, and hope you would accept one for your park as well. They bloom in May, and I thought it would be a perfect reminder of a beautiful life. Secondly, I gave my grandmother who is living with cancer Jax’s poem, and she LOVED it and was proud that Jax had written it. Dad and I are planning a trip to see you all soon. I have to admit, I miss you all so much and wish I could give you a hug each and every day. Hang in there, and remember that God makes us strong. I keep forcing myself to go to church because I have so little faith left and it seems so hard, but each Sunday, it seems as though my pastor is telling me it will be okay and that things will get better. I can only continue to believe in faith, and believe in the power of Jax. I hope you can do the same. God bless you, Casey Jax, I’m subbing in kindergaten on Friday. You better BELIEVE that I will need your help, and will thinking about you ALL day…I’ll do my best. I love you, and I feel you with me each and every day. Fly high beautiful, fly high. ps…EEEEK!:)
cmd says:
October 22, 2008 at 10:24 pm -
Sharon and Torey-I can’t thank you enough for coming today. I know it meant a lot to the girls for you to be at the Senior Meet, and for Torey to give the Senior Speeches. Sharon- thank you for keeping your promise. I don’t imagine it was an easy thing to do. I know for Megan, this day wouldn’t have been complete without her gymnastic “parents” sharing it with her.XOColleen
alicia says:
October 22, 2008 at 9:09 pm -
I MISS YOU =( <3 alicia
christine seiders cornwell says:
October 22, 2008 at 9:06 pm -
Sharon…I just read your entry and my heart dropped! The same thing happen to me, fever everything, I was in the hospital for 4 days and on iv antibiotics at my house with visiting nurses for 30 days. Did Dr. Shanoy (not sure of spelling) put the line in?? I am so sorry for what you have been through! Jacquie and you sure were strong!!!
Mindy says:
October 22, 2008 at 7:37 pm -
I am constantly keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers. I only wish there was something more that I could do for you from Geneseo. On Friday, there is a group of students that are putting on a bake sale in Jacquie’s honor, so there are flyers with her beautiful picture everywhere on campus. Its a wonderful image to see everywhere I go advertising for this event.I truly hope that you are finding comfort in knowing that Jacquie is at peace now, and in hearing all the amazing stories that people have shared with you. I know that the pain you are feeling is something that I will never fully understand, but just find ease in knowing that I am thinking of you always and always praying for you.Keep your head up. Hirsch’s I love you always. I know that everyone has been saying this, but please let me know if there is anything that you need. <3 Mindy
Nurse Kimberly says:
October 22, 2008 at 7:33 pm -
Sharon, I have been thinking and praying for all of you. I was reading some of your entries and want you to know that in the time I spent with Jax, she knew you were doing everything “right” so that she had the best chance at beating her disease. She was able to rest easier and relied on YOU to do all the “right” things so that she could concentrate on getting better. I love you and know that you did everything that any mother would have done for her dear and loving daughter. I am here if you need to talk, cry, or just be hugged.
Caitlin Burgher says:
October 22, 2008 at 6:01 pm -
Hello Hirsch’s, Strangely i was going through my old highschool notebooks that i have (clutterbug that i am) and keep everything! I was reading my old creative writing journal from the spring ’02 that stated Jacquie Hirsch was my best friend and i wrote a story about us being in a parade together, it went on and on about how wonderful she is and how she makes me laugh and is the perfect person to lead in a parade with! Very amusing and i should probably copy it and send it on here instead of writing ABOUT it but my creative writing skills were never that great and i would be way to embarrissed to do so. It made me laugh and remember how much fun we had in highschool..i also came across the numerous cards she sent me in the college years and am so thankful to have had a friend who cared so much about me and that i cared about aswell, enough to even be my parade partner! Never to be forgotten- she will always be with all of us forever:)
Anonymous says:
October 22, 2008 at 3:38 pm -
it’s cold and gloomy out today, so im sending some warm hungs and thoughts your way. love you all very much. Whitney
Angela says:
October 22, 2008 at 9:23 am -
love you all so much!!!!
Huer says:
October 22, 2008 at 8:52 am -
Sharon, Okay so I know we live in Buffalo, but seriously snow already. I think Jacquie is up there laughing her rear end off that we are down here running around getting our gloves and scarves and boots ready while she’s up there having a blast. I love you. Always Believing. XoxoxoxoAshley
alicia says:
October 21, 2008 at 10:50 pm -
max, it seems you are having trouble posting on the website… but someone on here explained to Ali (lil lil) how to do it from a mac, and she told me. so i’ll tell you. don’t use safari, instead use mozilla firefox, and then you should be able to do it! (i am assuming your problems are stemming from using a mac and not a pc. i could be wrong.) hope this helps!
alicia says:
October 21, 2008 at 10:47 pm -
just sending my love, thoughts, and prayers before bedtime. hang in there, hang in there, hang in there.xoxoxo<3 alicia <3
Max says:
October 21, 2008 at 8:30 pm -
Jill W. says:
October 21, 2008 at 8:03 pm -
Sharon… I love you!
Anonymous says:
October 21, 2008 at 3:51 pm -
Mrs. Hirsh I had read what you wrote on Oct 14th, the doubt of you decisions the uncertainty of all the what ifs.. All I can pray and hope for you is to find peace in all that you have done and tried to do for your daughter and continue to do. Your an amazing Mother, Jax was blessed to have had you by her side watching out for her, guiding her, protecting her, encouraging her. Had you done things differently and the outcome the same you would of still wondered what if. There are NO ifs in the fact that YOU AND YOUR FAMILY did everything that you could of done and continue to do so in her spirit and honor. How you all helped her and others is an inspiration and blessing. I Thank You for having been able to witness the love, support, encouragement and strength of your family.
Bree says:
October 21, 2008 at 3:28 pm -
My Precious Jacquie, I think I found a soulmate for Aunt Sheryl’s “Tinkerbell shorts lady”. A couple of days ago I was going into Tops and I met a lady coming out of the store. She was “amply endowed” and was wearing a bright lime green sweatshirt. Then I saw Tinkerbell on her left “ample endowment” and I must have gotten a big smile on my face because the lady gave me a big smile and seemed glad that I liked her sweatshirt. I guess I gave her a little lift and I’m glad. Thank you for finding ways to help us smile through our tears. I miss you more than there are stars in the sky or grains of sand on the beach and I love you forever, my precious Granddaughter. Your Bree.
alicia says:
October 21, 2008 at 12:42 pm -
the weather is horrible today: windy, dreary, and bitter. and every song on pandora is reminding me of you. like angela, today is a bad day for missing you. everything seems to be that much more painful when i think of you. ughhhhhhhhh. that’s all i feel like i can say sometimes. ughhhhhhhhhh. i miss you. i love you. but i do see you everywhere. you are in everything around us and you will live on through that. If I see a tree that reminds me of you, you are living on through that tree; when a song reminds me of you, you are living on through that song; you live on in everything Tink; every single time I see or hear the word “BELIEVE” you are living on in that. The list could go on and on and on. I miss you so much beautiful girl. Soooo many things I want to tell you.. but I just have to remind myself that you already know. i love you so much beautiful girl. without a doubt you are the most beautiful person, spirit, soul etc. that any of us have ever had the privilege of meeting. <3 delisha <3this one song just played on Pandora and everytime I hear these lyrics, they of course remind me of you and the pain we all feel and the struggles we are all enduring in the wake of your loss: "and I have the sense to recognize that I don’t know how to let you go." I love you. I miss you. I will be watching for the stars tonight, as I do every night. xoxo
Angela says:
October 21, 2008 at 12:00 pm -
today is a bad jacquie day! i am really really missing you bad today jax!!!!! i still dont believe it is real sometimes i think i am gonna get to see you again and then i remember your not here! i miss you.i love you. i will always, love cousin angela
Huer says:
October 21, 2008 at 8:32 am -
Sharon, I can’t think of the right words to write this morning, I don’t know why but I’m having trouble. I thought about writing to you how I’ve been babysitting my cousins all weekend/week and my cousins are constantly talking about Jacquie. Donald hardly knew Jax but he still thinks of things to say about her. He even includes your whole family in his nightly prayers. I thought about writing how much I miss Jax and miss visiting her and talking to her and getting her insight or hearing her gossip. I thought about writing how much I believe a Mother will always be with her daughter no matter how far apart they are. But I just don’t have the words today…I love you and only hope that the pain you are feeling isn’t too bad today, I hope you get to hear or remember a funny Jacquie story and smile. Always always always believing, Ashley
Sadie says:
October 20, 2008 at 9:42 pm -
Hello Hirsch Family, Thinking of you today like I always am. I was thinking about believing today… I know that I still believe but I was thinking about what that means. I used to list the things I believed for Jax to read and I think I should do that still. It’s shifted a little bit now – for the past year through Jacquie’s fight I believed so strongly in so many things… the biggest of which that Jax would get better. We all did. I guess what I have to grasp is that Jacquie is better – she is okay and she is free. I guess I never thought that her getting better would leave us all so empty but it has because she’s not with us anymore. I still believe… I certainly believe in angels, and in heaven, I believe in faith and I believe that Jacquie is sending us signs. I believe in the power of love and most of all I still believe in Jacquie. I believe that she wants us to keep going to keeplaughing for her and to keep crying for her to keep smiling when we think of her even if it also breaks our hearts. She wants us to keep holding on to each other and to keep fighting because I still believe that this stupid effing disease can be beaten and we – Jacquie’s Army – is going to help that happen. This sucks – it is horrible and painful and there is a big hole in our hearts… but even with all of the pain, I know I still believe and Jacquie helps me everyday to keep believing even more. She is not gone. I love you guys and think of you constantly. I hope I get to see you soon. Always Loving and Believing, <3 Sadie
Sharon,... I hope you made it through B.J.’s says:
October 20, 2008 at 8:11 pm -
June McCarthy-Dimig says:
October 20, 2008 at 7:57 pm -
missy says:
October 20, 2008 at 7:32 pm -
Dear Hirschs, Sending strength and love through prayers. BELIEVING Missy
Mel Cook says:
October 20, 2008 at 7:22 pm -
I am missing Jax an extra lot today… Like many others I see signs of Jacquie in my everyday life… there is a little girl at the school that I work at that wears a tinkerbell shirt at least three times a week. Although it cant be sanitary how much she wears this shirt (haha) I know that it is her favorite one, and it brings a smile to my face and makes me think of Jax every time I see that little girl. I miss you so very much Jacquita… especially today for some reason, maybe that means your having an extra fun day up there. Love you and missing you always. Hirsch’s I pray everyday that although it seems impossible, this will somehow get easier for you. Take comfort in those around you and in the fact that Jacquie made an impact on this world and was so loved. Love Mel Cook
alicia says:
October 20, 2008 at 5:30 pm -
I saw this quote on a knick knacky sort of thing and I loved it and wanted to share it with you:”I believe if I try hard enough I can fly. Even if I never do, it’s believing that matters.”i love you all so much. xoxoxo<3 alicia <3p.s. michael, I saw this woman make meatloaf sandwiches last week on the TODAY show and thought of you & jac. maybe that can help you spice up your lifeless loaf of meat. (ew, said that way, meatloaf sounds even less appetizing! haha)
Liz Fassl says:
October 20, 2008 at 5:19 pm -
Sharon, Torey and TJ,Today I thought of Jacquie all day. My roommate and I are organizing a bone marrow drive at her school (University of Illinois in Chicago) and so we spent our day hanging up fliers. Although it was cold and rainy here I could feel Brace’s warmth with me as we went from building to building. I can only hope that our drive will help some family avoid what you are going through. I still believe.Love,Liz
K.C. Monahan says:
October 20, 2008 at 4:02 pm -
Hi Hirschs and Believers! Jax-I hope you enjoyed the performance that we put on for you this weekend at BW alumni weekend! It was tons of fun…but it just wasn’t the same being in Geneseo without you (especially the IB)! TJ (Uncle Mayo)-It was so nice seeing you! You still dive pretty great for an old man too! Miss you already! Sharon & Torey-Just as I had previously woke up and prayed that it would be a good day for Jax, I now wake up and hope that you will have a good day, because I do believe that every day is a good day for Jax now. All the best!
Michael Stoughton says:
October 20, 2008 at 12:06 pm -
hello…and a hug from az…had meatloaf last night…it doesnt have the punch that it used to, but I will always think of Jacquie when I have a well mixed pound of ground beef formed like bread with a string of ketchup (or catsup for you others) down the middle… nothing says “I gave up on making dinner” more than meatloaf… a piece for you Jax…
Angela says:
October 20, 2008 at 11:16 am -
good morning!! just wanted to let you know that im thinking of you AGAIN like always this morning jacquie! aunt sharon and unlce torey it was so nice to see you on sat and tj thanks for meeting me on friday for lunch…i miss you guys too so it was nice to get together! i love you always, cousin angela
marlene says:
October 19, 2008 at 11:03 pm -
Dear Sharon,I read your updates, and my heart breaks for you. i can not imagine your sorrow. Know that other hearts, break for you…know that other hearts, want to carry your pain… I hope that helps lighten your load. Marlene xo
missy says:
October 19, 2008 at 9:39 pm -
Dear Sharon, The word “BELIEVE” seems to be everywhere now. Or maybe now I just look at the word differently. I cant even count how many times I see it in a day, but after each time I do, I think of Jacquie’s courage and strength. The same courage and strength you are demonstrating daily. Know you are in my prayers. Believing in you Missy
Amanda Cavarella says:
October 19, 2008 at 3:57 pm -
Sharon, Torey and Tj, Know that I am thinking and praying for you all everyday. Tj-it was so nice to see you this weekend, I had a good time. Jacquie was so blessed to have such a kind, thoughtful, older brother, and she knew it! Good job diving too! Jacquie-I miss you so much and think of about you constantly. So many things make me think of you and what an amazing person you are. I love you and miss you. Stay strong and keep believing, love ~mandz
Joe Browning says:
October 19, 2008 at 1:59 pm -
Hello Hirsch’s. I was just listening to a song that ive heard a bunch of times, but I made a strong connection to your family this time through. Its called “Hear You Me”by Jimmy Eat World. Im not sure if I hear Jacquiie saying the words or one of you to her, maybe even a combination: There’s no one in town I knowYou gave us some place to go.I never said thank you for that.I thought I might get one more chance.What would you think of me now,so lucky, so strong, so proud?I never said thank you for that,now I’ll never have a chance.May angels lead you in.Hear you me my friends.On sleepless roads the sleepless go.May angels lead you in.So what would you think of me now,so lucky, so strong, so proud?I never said thank you for that,now I’ll never have a chance.May angels lead you in. Hear you me my friends.On sleepless roads the sleepless go.May angels lead you in.May angels lead you in.May angels lead you in.And if you were with me tonight,I’d sing to you just one more time.A song for a heart so big,god wouldn’t let it live.May angels lead you in.Hear you me my friends.On sleepless roads the sleepless go.May angels lead you in.May angels lead you in.Hear you me my friends.On sleepless roads the sleepless go.May angels lead you in.May angels lead you in. The purple lyrics arfe what stood out. What I want to say about it is this: Its very hard, but you need to have confidence that everything happened just as it was supposed to. There wasn’t anything more for you to do, you did all and more than was needed. May the Angels lead precious Jacquie in, and may the angels (Jacquie too) Lead you to peace within. Don’t live in regret, but rejoice in the many wonderful things that happened in such short of a time. Sing for Jacquie tonight, as i’m sure she will be singing alongside you. May peace be with you, Hirsch’s. Love Joe Browning
Max says:
October 19, 2008 at 7:42 am -
Sara (albuquerque) says:
October 18, 2008 at 11:55 pm -
Hi Sharon- I was moved by what Indie wrote because she put into words some of what I have been feeling…it will take time, lots of time and Jacquie was taken way too early and young- I don’t understand it, I probably never will as there is no reason or answer; but I agree with Indie and what TJ believes…that we need to keep doing what Jacquie loved, believed in and live life; keep her memory alive. I do believe she will be smiling and guiding all of us. She undoubtley has the strength and ability to guide and to be an angel and fairy to all of us. I am hoping right now she can guide you, TJ and Torey and give you extra strength and courage during the most roughest of moments. I am thinking about you!! Love, Sara
Anonymous says:
October 18, 2008 at 3:15 pm -
Dear Sharon, Hoping this day beings your heart a little sunshine. Know I’m praying for you and so believing in you . Missy
Kim says:
October 18, 2008 at 8:24 am -
Sharon, Torey and TJ, Just wanted to let you know that you are in our thoughts everyday. We all wish we can take some of your pain from you. It is so funny how many things can happen in 1 day that brings Jax to mind. She has made such an impact on everyones life. That is the kind of person she was. She will forever be with us. We will all continue to help you fight for her cause. Love and miss you all. Jax we do still “BELEIVE” and will continue to fight !
Natalie M. says:
October 17, 2008 at 10:51 pm -
Family: I wanted to tell you that Jax is always in my thoughts. My brother bought be a tinkerbell key chain just to remind me of her. Hang in there! Jax would want you to take every day and to never waste a minute of it. She is looking down, and I know she wishes she can come back down and to talk to you again, but she cant, and you have to believe that she wants you to be happy, and if your happy, she is happy. Stay strong guys 🙂 -Natalie M.
Indie says:
October 17, 2008 at 9:07 pm -
Dear Sharon, Torey and TJ, I think of you every day, and like you, I feel the anniversaries. Even going to NYC, hearing about Sloan represents Jacquie. For Anjalie and Ryan it’s a song that plays on the radio or a memory of when you were here. I believe Jacquie is with us and when we have moments of calm, we can feel her and she does come to us, in a dream, in a symbol in a feeling. All 3 of you had gone to the ends of the earth to help and care for Jacquie, so not for one minute should you doubt your actions. They were all the right ones to do. Should she have been given more freedom, more and earlier pain, complications could have occurred and you would have said, for what had I allowed this! I do know that Jacquie would want us all to live and love as she had done so wonderfully! We will need time to do this as she would wish. She was taken from us suddenly and too young, this is what makes it exceptionally hard for us to understand. We may never understand the why, but we can understand her gifts to us all and the good she has brought to so very many people. We need to take her beliefs/lessons and apply them, that would make her so happy and bring everlasting meaning. We love you all and wish healing and comfort for everyone!
Kate says:
October 17, 2008 at 6:32 pm -
Sharon, Torey & TJ, The other day, I was walking my dog with my boyfriend and I saw this little girl on her front porch. She was a beautiful little girl with golden blonde hair. She had on a pretty purple dress-up dress and a set of fairy wings. When he saw us and stopped what she was doing. Then she smiled, such a big, beautiful smile, then she started to sing a pretty song to herself. I looked at by boyfriend and said “Jacquie Hirsch lives on”. I wish and pray you all weren’t hurting so badly, but how could you not be. I don’t think there is one of us out here that knew Jaq that didn’t think “why not me!”. Jaq had it all! And hopefully she can heal your hearts from heaven….hopefully soon. Much love and hugs, Kate