Jax, the torment you are causing so many people is a true reflection of your character and love. YOU ARE PAINFULLY MISSED by so many. Sharon, as everyone has stated, your questions are so normal to wonder, but your role as Jacquie’s mom protected and provided for her. We didn’t get the outcome we had all dreamed of, but please don’t question your loyalty, devotion and love given to Jax. She knew it then and she knows it now. My arms are holding you, tor and tj tightly. I miss you so much!!!
Sharon~ I was reading your post from the other day, and I just wanted to let you know I think you are an amazing mom. Definitly one of a kind just like Jacquie. I think everything you did and everything your still doing for Jax is incredible. I was thinking also about what you said about her favorite food places and Im sure because Jax couldn’t have those things everyday that when she was given the ok it made it that more special! Cuz we all know how much she loves her food! I know all us girls admire you and of course Jacquie. I’m thinking of you everyday. Always here if need anything. Love always, Nichole Love you and missing you Tink
Jax, I miss you tons and still think about you constantly… To the Hirsch family, Keep on getting through the days and leaning in each other for support. You are doing amazing…
One more thing, I am going to post some of the lyrics from Coldplay’s song “Fix You.” I have been listening to it a lot lately… the lead singer, Chris Martin, wrote it for Gwyneth Paltrow when her father passed away and she was beside herself. For you Sharon, Torey, and TJ, I know there is no “fixing you” that can take place… but I know ALL of us hope that we can eventually help make your days a little easier and help push you forward through each day. We all love you so much!!!”When you try your best but you don’t succeedWhen you get what you want but not what you needWhen you feel so tired but you can’t sleep Stuck in reverse.And the tears come streaming down your face When you lose something you can’t replace When you love someone but it goes to waste Could it be worse?Lights will guide you home And ignite your bonesAnd I will try to fix you”xoxoxo <3 alicia <3 xoxoxoxo
Sharon, first I want to respond to your post on October 14th. I am with everyone, that was such a heartwrenching post to read, but I am so grateful that you are able to express those feelings to all of us. Anyway, for lack of a better saying, I believe in situations like these you are sort of d*mned if you do and d*mned if you don’t. You question the actions and choices you made in regard to Jacquie’s choice… but of course you will, its only natural to wonder “what if I had let her have whatever she wanted.” But you have to realize, if you had let Jac eat out at Mighty, have McDonalds chicken nuggets, see her friends that were sick… deep down you know what would have come of that, probably a very very sick Jacquie way earlier on, and if that happened, and if the outcome were still the same, you know that you would be feeling 100000000x worse about your choices and actions. You were Jacquie’s BFF, but first and foremost you were acting as her MOTHER! The book she gave you is “Why a Daughter Needs a Mom” not “Why a Daughter Needs a BFF”. I don’t know if there is a quote in the book that is like what I am about to say, “A daughter needs a Mom to be a Mom and make the tough decisions for her even if they aren’t the most desired decisions.”Its the same thing as when we are 16 years old and whine and cry and throw hissy fits because our horrible mothers who care & love us so much that they are giving us a curfew of midnight, instead of 2 am. But the difference is, at that age you can’t always tell that your parents are doing it because they love you and want to keep you as safe as possible. In your case with Jacquie, she knew deep down that your decisions and actions were the right ones, and essentially, the only ones. She just needed you to act as her caring, protective mother, and say, sorry no McDonalds, and even if you’re tired you must do your exercises.So a long story short, Sharon you were the best BFF AND Mom to Jacquie… she could have not imagined a better person fit for the dual job title! They were tough decisions you, Torey & TJ had to make everyday, and that is part of the reason why we all admire you guys so much… you made so many tough decisions that I am sure many of us wonder if we could have made the same.Keep hanging in there, keep pushing on, you guys are all doing so well. I love you all so much!xoxoxo <3 alicia <3 xoxoxoxoxo
Hi, Now I know why yesterday was one of those tougher days where the tears were filling to the brim, it was a landmark date. All last night as I drove to the hospital where I volunteer in the NICU what kept repeating in my mind was “it is just not fair, it is just not right and it makes me sad”. Jacquie was amazingly strong in so many ways and she truly did win with each step of her treatment!!!! Jacquie- I still believe, but boy are you missed in this world!! Sharon, Torey and TJ- I will always believe in you! Sara and family
I’m not known for the softer side or the expressin g my feelings much sharon , your message two days ago broke my heart… what if what if what if… that eats us alive, trying to answer the unanwserable… just know that i think the same about things all the time…no solice i know, but it is my gut… stoughton love from the southwest
Good Morning Sharon, Last night Jes, Cait, Sandra and I got together for a little girls only night. And our conversations led to you and Jacquie. We talked about alot of things and even though the conversations brought someteary eyes, our memories of Jacquie are so strong and the love we have for her is even stronger. I can’t take your pain away, and trust me I wish I could. But I can keep reminding you that Jacquie (your Angel and ours) will never ever be forgotten. We talk about her daily, think of her more and promise to do whatever we can to keep her memory alive. We are the best ciao bella believers ever!! xoxo Ashley
Jacquie, I miss you sooooo much! The last time I wrote to you and was having a horrible day because I couldn’t stop crying about you…you came to me in my dreams and it was honestly the first time that I thought I got a “message” from you. Well today is another one of those days where I can’t get the tears to stop. The closer the holidays get the more I believe life sucks! My favorite part about holidays was getting together with the family…and I really only wanted to go to family parties if you were going to be there. Now you’re not going to be there and I don’t want to be there either! This is sooo stupid!!!! I would give ANYTHING to have you back and healthy again! There will always be a hole in this family now…just like the hole in my heart. Sometimes I get chest pains because I cry so hard. I just want to see you and talk to you and laugh with you. The last time I wrote to you and begged you to come to me, you did through my dreams that night…and when i woke up, it was the first time since you passed away that i felt a little bit at peace. I started to feel like you really are ok. But now, just like your mom, I’m starting to have doubts again. What if you’re lonely, or scared, or sad…Please come to me again! Even if it is through a dream…I need to know that you’re happy and smiling and laughing and being the Jacquie that we all hold so dear to our hearts. I need reassurance from you that you’re at peace. I have so many things I want to say to you. Please, Jax please come visit me! I love you sooooo much and miss you more than words could ever say!!! Loving and missing you always,Cousin Kerri
Sharon, I read your post last night and thought about what you had written all night. I just couldn’t come up with the right words, I’m still not sure I have. I guess there will always be those unanswered questions and second guesses, but what you need to know is that you are a mother and mothers do everything humanly possible to protect, love, teach and satisfy their children. You raised an incredibe daughter and did everything you could to make her happy. You always looked out for her best interest even though jacquie may have not thought so at the time, but really you did. So don’t you dare think for a minute you let her down or did something wrong. instead think about the amazing daughter you raised. heck, why do you think we all miss her so much. You are a great mother Sharon, and everytime you have a doubt just think about the impact jacquie has made on all of us and how pround we all are to say that we know her and that we love her and miss her. my heart achs for you because I just wish that you don’t have to deal with this pain, I wish I could just take it all away. I know I can’t and it’s not that easy. I just wish there was a way. Just know that we love you always and are here whenever you need a hug, a smile, or someone to lean on. always thinking about you guys and sending all my love and strength. <3333 Whitney ps. I had my first official observation today. I was teaching fifth grade english. I was so nervous but ended up doing a good job. Later when I was talking to my teacher I couldn’t help but giggle a little and smile, the first time in my life I actually tried to teach a kid something was almost eight years ago one Saturday morning, yep, when I was jacquie’s assistant. sometimes in a way I think she was one of the reasons I wanted to be a teacher or maybe torey since he offered me a job, but mostly jax for showing me how to be a good teacher. Thanks Jax, I owe you one.<3
Dear Sharon, I read your update yesterday, and I took your thoughts with me throughout the day to digest your feelings. I suppose anyone who loves their child would wonder and second guess the same things. As much as we want to protect them, we also want to give them the simple joys that will make them happy. I would have done the same as you if Jacquie were my daughter. It’s part of a mother’s love to protect and care for her child first and foremost. We always have to make sure that the playground is safe before we can let them run free. It’s part of the job as a mom. You are a remarkable person. As much as you tried to protect and care for Jacquie, you and Torey and Tj still did many things for Jacquie to attempt to bring some sort of normalcy into the life altering sickness she was cpoing with. Think back to Jacquie’s birthday party at Roswell. You invited so many friends an loved ones to share in her day. Think about the family times you shared together watching that Tuesday night TV show that made Jacquie laugh. You made a point of watching that show every week so Jacquie could have an hour of laughter and forget everything else. There are many other things that youu and Torey and TJ did to make Jacquie smile. Again, I completely understand that you may have days where you question yourself, but PLEASE remind yourself of the times when you brought that beautiful smile to Jacquie’s face. Even with what she was dealing with, you were able to bring her a smile with the gift of your love. That’s the best gift a mother could give. You did it ALL right. Jacquie is proud of you. Believe. Love, Jennifer, xoxoxo
Always thinking of you and about you and missing you all. I am thinking about Jacquie’s light up the room smile and it makes my heart smile. To Amber from Geneseo… as your former coach, who knew you since you were so young…you have grown up into a fine young woman and you have written beautiful things to the Hirschs. I am proud of you!! Love and hugs and hand holds from way out here in NM!!! Sara
Sharon- Anyone who knows you (and Jacquie knew you best of all), knows you did everything in your power to protect Jacquie. You did all those things because you love your daughter. You should never second guess the things you did out of love.”A mother is she who can take the place of all others but whose place no one else can take.” – Cardinal MermillodYou were everything Jacquie needed you to be.
Dear Sharon, Please don’t second guess yourself on anything you did for Jacquie over this past year. You did an incredible job not only caring for her, but loving her with all of your heart. Every no, Every yes, Every choice, Every decision, was made out of the purest kind of love and concern anyone could have for another. Jacquie knows how much you love her and it showed in everything you did for her. Everything you did mattered and made a difference for Jacquie for the better. You were the constant in her life everyday. You were her strength, her confidant, her protector, her friend, her mother. You fought right along side of her and are still fighting through her foundation. Please dont ever feel like you should have done this or that. You are an outstanding mother who did whatever it took. Jacquie knows that and loves you so much for it. Sharon, please see how much you helped Jacquie and know how much everything you did for her made a difference. Know how much you are loved and if I can do anything to help you with ANYTHING please let me. Its when its the hardest that you must believe the strongest. Sending prayers of strength. Believing in you, Missy
Hi Sharon, I was sad to see that you are having such a rough day. If it were not for you, Jacquie’s life would never have been complete. We all know how important you were to her and it was ever evident in your love and care for her during her illness. You did the best you could for her because you BELIEVED!!! That is why you NEEDED to do the things that you did for her. Your unwavering care for her will never go in vain! Again, it is okay to be angry, and we will all have doubts and regrets…but Jacquie didn’t have ANY…and she would never want you to have any either! I am going to ’light the night’ tomorrow not only for Jacquie, but for you, and Torey, and T.J.! I hope your day tomorrow is a little brighter! My thoughts and prayers are with you always!<3Pauline
Hi Sharon – your post this morning saddened my heart. As a health care provider for over 30 years, I have seen first hand the horrors of cancer. Jacquie beat the odds and lived longer than most with that wretched disease because of the love of her Mom! You did everything right, everything a parent should do to protect and nurture her child. Hindsight is always 20/20 – it is so easy to second guess your motives after the fact. Please don’t do that to yourself – it does nothing but cause more grief and heartache. Our children need their Moms most during an illness, and you were there constantly for Jacquie. Remember all the wonderful moments you shared and don’t let the “what if’s” cloud those memories. Take care and stay strong. Wendy
Sharon, you did everything above and beyond what any mother would do for her child..and never in a bad way. You protected her while she was being attacked, you took all procautions and never chanced the health or safety of Jacquie..i am so thankful to you for doing so and wouldn’t have had it any other way..i know she feels the same! You’re an amazing mother and as horrible as an experience as it was you and Jacquie laughed the whole way through..never doubt or regret your decisions they were the right ones! Im sorry for your rough days, you made Jacquie so happy even when it looked impossible.
Sharon, Again, i can say that i never even met jacquie, but from posts i feel like i knew her very well. from what i’ve read, i don’t think she could have ever been disappointed or angry by the way you protected her. what you did was NOT in vain. you fufilled your duties as a great mother, and i’m sure jacquie was more than thankful for that. while everything you did could not save her from her disease, it did make your time with her that much more special. because of these posts, i am forced everyday to count my blessings…i cannot thank jacquie enough for this gift to me. i am constantly reminding myself that little arguments with my own parents, siblings, and fiancee are so unnecessary, and i am just thankful for their presence in my life. thank you for recording jacquie’s story as it has made me a better person. keep BELIEVING and stay STRONG
Sharon,Dont beat yourself up over things you did to help jax. you did the best you knew, you are an amazing parent. I sure she had great comfort knowing how much you really cared… as we all did.Your family has taught me so much about my own life, and everything in it. thank you so much for that
Sharon, Squeeze your hand and know that I am with you. Jacquie….it is more than excruciatingly painfully hard for everyone, because you possess such beautiful, unique qualities.You have quite a family! Torey, TJ and Sharon- take a breath and hang in and hang on. Thinking of you. Sara
aunt sharon, as i read your message this morning i felt that i needed to tell you that jax may have hated to take some meds or wear her mask, and yes she probably would have liked an extra trip to mighty taco BUT all you did for her was for a reason and just because things didnt turn out the way we had all expected you did everything right and she appreciated it! she loved her bff and wouldnt have changed a singel thing that you did for her!!!!! i love you so much and am missing jacquie everyday as well! please know that i am here! i love you all, cousin angela
I run for hopeI run to feelI run for the truthFor all that is realI run for your mother your sister your wifeI run for you and me my friendI run for lifeAnd someday if they tell you about itIf the darkness knocks on your doorRemember her remember meWe will be running as we have beforeRunning for answersRunning for moreI run for lifei love you.
i’m here, i feel so still, as if time has stopped. maybe somewhere it has…………. jacquie i am still holding you and your mom and dad and tj tightly. i will never let go.
Oh Sharon, Your post today just broke my heart. Especially because the girls and I have been talking about very similar things. When we saw Jax just a few months ago when she got to go home we didn’t hug her – we didn’t want to because we didn’t want to risk giving her any germs at all. If we had known what we know now would we have hugged her so tight… of course we would have. But then we still would have wondered… was it our hugs? There will always be questions. It’s easy to say that you just can’t think like that but it is not so easy to do – you can’t control how you think or how you feel and so of course these questions are going to come into your mind. We all believed with such conviction that there would be a different outcome – we were not being naive, we knew that what she had was bad but we all just kept believing with all of our hearts that the world wouldn’t be so unfair as to take her away from us. You did exactly what you needed to do – you took care of your daughter and fiercely protected her. You are an amazing Mom. You are wondering if any of it mattered… it did. It didn’t do what we all hoped and believed it would but it certainly mattered. You were and are Jacquie’s BFF, her Mom, her warden… by protecting her and caring for her the way you did you grew the amazing bond between you two. She knew that you would go to the ends of the earth for her so yes it definitely mattered. She needed you there to protect her and though she may have wanted those other things, fast food etc. she knew she needed you and she was so honored to have you as her mother protecting her with all you had. I remember talking to her around Mother’s day and her telling me what a great Mom you are. She also said “A lot of girls would go crazy constantly being with their Moms but I’m good. I’m good with just me and my Mom.” So Sharon yes you did everything you could to be there for and protect your daughter. And oh imagine if you had not protected her the way that you did, the questions that you have now would be different and worse. You did exactly what you needed to do and it certainly mattered. I am thinking of you all everyday and of course Jacquie – constantly and always, she is in my heart. I love you guys. <3 Sadie
Sharon, I am always thinking about you, everyday you go through my mind. Losing a child has to be the most difficult thing in the world, no one should have to go through it. I spent as much time as I could with Jax during her battle, and you know what through all of our conversations, all of the laughter and tears and anger, she never once said “I wish my Mom would…” The care you gave her, the rules you set were what gave her the strength she had to fight as long as she did. She fought HARD for almost a year. Mrs. Fassl once told me that she had asked Jacquie if it was okay if she took you to lunch and you know what? Jacquie told her no, Jacquie wanted you around because you kept her safe, you kept her going, you kept her laughing, you gave her everything she needed. Regret is something that is easy to have, and losing hope at times is easy too. Days of not being able to Believe are to be expected. But please don’t spend more than 1 sec thinking you weren’t the best darn Warden, Nurse, BFF or Mommy to Jacquie!! love you. xo-Believing-xo Ashley
Sharon, The ribbon necklace that we gave to Jax is a Strong Women necklace, and it is our wish that you wear it now. You are astrong woman, one of the strongest I know, and it would make us extremely proud for you to continue wearing that necklace. It proudly showed the world that my mom was brave after fighting her cancer, and it will show the world that you too are brave after battling this horrible disease, because we both know that you have also fought. Regain strength through the knowledge that we ALL love you and are standing right behind you, ready to catch you should you stumble. Torey and TJ, You too are always in my thoughts and prayers. Not a day goes by that I don’t think about how you are doing, and how amazingly strong you were for Jax through everything. You too must remain strong and know that we love you dearly. Jax, Dad isn’t even kidding about the banana peels, and they are being thrown down the roads of New Jersey and even Canada too on occasion. I see your smile and hear your laugh whenever I think about retelling that story in July. It saddens me, but it also makes me smile, because I know you were happy at that point and I’m glad I could help you laugh. A year ago, you were asking me how solo week was going, when I should have been asking you the same question. I love you Jax, and I miss the living crap out of you every single day, but I know, that some day I’ll get to see you again, and that brings me some comfort. God Bless beautiful girl, and fly high. Love you always, Casey
Hi Sharon, I agree we so many others in saying Jacquie must be so proud of you! Your strength and courage is an inspiration every day! Please know there is not a day that goes by that I dont pray for God to be right next to you. Believing Missy
Hello family, Just a thought if you havn’t seen it, theres a new show call Hole in the wall or The hole. Something. But it reminded me of Jacquie and her love of crazy, embarrissing TV shows, its one she’d love im sure. Its on Fox..what else, and is pretty corny inbetween but watching people attempts to fit through strange shapes half the time too small to fit through in the first place makes me laugh and i can Jax in the room when i watch it laughing..hard! your daughter/sister had the Loudest most Contageous laugh ever!!!
Hello beautiful… so I was studying and listening to some music and a song that i haven’t heard in ages came on, and surprise surprise, it reminded me of you. its by none other than the wise tom petty. “And some things are overSome things go onAnd part of me you carryPart of me is goneBut you got a heart so bigIt could crush this townAnd I can’t hold out foreverEven walls fall down”loving you forever beautiful. xoxoxoxoxxo<3 alicia <3
This morning as I stared at 3 photos of Elise, for school, the image of Elise suddenly became a vision of Jacquie at this age with her hair pulled back, wearing the jean jacket I remember so vividly and standing there with that SMILE. My eyes filled with tears, and I had to catch my breath. Missing and caring and thinking about you, all of you.
Dear Sharon, Torey and TJ Not a day goes by that I don’t think of Jacquie and her wonderful family. Eventhough your hearts are broken, Jacquie would be so proud of how much love you are showing and how strong you truly are. This website is a blessing and has helped countless people mourn the loss of such a wonderful daughter. Sharon, your last message was just beautiful. It really made me stop and appreciate everything I have in my life. Sometimes we get so caught up in the day to day activities we forget what is truly important. I thank you for reminding me to treasure the time with my family, friends and loved ones. I was so happy to read you are planting a flower garden for Jacquie. That will be a special place that you can recount all the great memories and feel closer to her. Gardening is good therapy also! I’m glad you mentioned that it doesn’t take time or money to make the world a happier place. I try to remember that everyday when I visit my mother in the memory care unit at Brompton. I try to do a good deed everyday for one of the residents. It really makes me feel better knowing that somehow I brightened their day. Jacquie’s love for life is being passed on through our good deeds. She is everywhere. I hope you have a good day today. Love, Athena
Good Morning, Sharon thank you for writing such beautiful posts. I hope writing them helps you as much as reading them helps me. I miss Jax so much, I keep two pictures of just her and I on my dresser, one from middle school and one from last summer. Every morning I look at them and think of Jacquie. I think of how much I love her and am lucky to have such a wonderful friend. I believe she is with me (us) and really helping guide us everyday. I love you all and hope that you have a peaceful day full of happy memories of Jacquie. xoxo…always believing Ashley
Sharon, Torey ,TJ, You have found the perfect way to honor Jacquie .As the flowers bloom each new year it reminds you of her continuing love and faithfulness to family and friends. Only god could make a flower and a life as special as Jacquie’s. May you find comfort as He cares for her now and in the strength and support of all those who love you. We think of you daily. Marcia and family
I miss you Jax, I think of you all the time. So many things bring you to mind. You are a one of a kind and greatly missed. Just wanted to let you know how much you are loved!!!!
Hi Sharon, Torey and TJ,I just wanted to let you know that I’m still thinking about you and Jacquie. I have the last note she wrote me up on my dresser so I can see it every day and think of her. I know she is looking down at all of us and helping us through each day. -Liz
Dear Sharon, Today was a day sent by Jacquie! The sun was shinning as bright as her smile. The warmth of the sun, as warm as her heart. The gentle breeze as light as her laugh. The colors of the trees as bold as her courage. The smell in the air as sweet as herself. This beautiful day, from a beautiful girl. Today was a day sent by Jacquie! Always BELIEVING Missy
this sunshine and weather is beautiful, thank you jacquie. sharon, i am consistently blown away by your eloquence… you are able to put thoughts and feelings into words in a way that most people could only dream of. as i always found that jacquie was comforting us or making us laugh when i thought it should be us comforting her or making her laugh – i am finding that sharon, you and your words comfort me in a way most things can’t… and yet again i feel as though we need to be/should be the ones comforting you. it is obvious that while so many of jacquie’s shining, remarkable qualities are qualities that are unique to her in their own way, are also shared by you Sharon, Torey, and TJ. I understand where Jacquie learned and was taught such selflessness, caring, and thoughtfulness (among so many others). keep hanging in there, doing whatever you must to get through each day. i love you all.<3 alicia <3 p.s. I think that the idea of a garden for Jacquie is wonderful. Before my dad passed, he planted a few clematis in various areas of the yard. And as each spring arrives, I try my best to maintain them so I can see them bloom. When they bloom they are just so beautiful, bright purple flowers. Anyway, I don’t think I have developed a green thumb yet because I have trouble with them... maybe sometime Sharon you can give me a few pointers, and we can work on Jacquie’s garden together, then I can bring the knowledge and love that you taught me and transfer it to my Dad’s clematis. I love you. xoxo
sharon, i don’t know how you find such beautiful things to say. jacquie will be with you every step of the way martha and she will help you with your decision making. jax, i love you, i think of you always and you will forever be in my heart
I got my Jacquie for ALL bracelet in the mail today. I also got the post-card with a little personal note on it… and it really made me wish I had contributed sooner. I think I felt like because I didn’t know Jacquie well, I didn’t belong in her struggle with the people who cared about her most. I felt like I wasn’t allowed to be that sad about it. And since last month, I realized that’s the stupidest thing ever. This web site, your posts, have let us in on a deeply personal level, and I couldn’t thank you more for that. It made me feel welcome to fight for Jacquie, and now I’ll do my part in her memory.I’ll wear my bracelet proudly – Jacquie, your memory shines here, too. May God keep you and your unbelievable family. You are all so loved.
i am sorry for not writing as often as i feel i should. everyday i wake up and say, “i should read jacquie’s website.” but i find it so difficult to read about how angry and hurt my family is, including myself. this isn’t fair and i try so hard everyday to live my life, but i can’t. and i’m finding it hard to keep going without my dearest cousin and friend. everyone has their own way of dealing with death. some days are better than others, but none are “great” or even “good” at this point. i miss you, jax! is this empty feeling ever going to fade? i will never forget you and you will always be apart of me….in my heart and soul….forever and ever….i still believe! i love u!
Hirsch Family, The best part about Geneseo is the Greek community… really what we should call ourselves is the Greek family. I hope you realize how Jacquies death was truly a loss not just for you, or for the SDT’s but to the entire Greek community. We, at Geneseo, pride ourselves on knowing everyone and knowing that every Greek organization is just a piece of the Greek community. It was incredible to see how every organization really stepped up when Jacquie was first diagnosed. The lines that we stood in for the cheek swab to see if we were a match for the bone marrow transplant, donations each organization made and kind words we had for each other. It was incredible as an alumni to hear the wonderful things my organization did for the SDT’s and said to them after Jacquies death. I have never been so proud to be Greek. Her struggle really reminded Geneseo greeks how much we do care about each other and about our own brothers and sisters in our organizations. Thanks for the reminder Jax! My thoughts and prayers are you with you Hirsch family, friends and SDT’s.
sue says:
October 17, 2008 at 5:48 pm -
Jax, the torment you are causing so many people is a true reflection of your character and love. YOU ARE PAINFULLY MISSED by so many. Sharon, as everyone has stated, your questions are so normal to wonder, but your role as Jacquie’s mom protected and provided for her. We didn’t get the outcome we had all dreamed of, but please don’t question your loyalty, devotion and love given to Jax. She knew it then and she knows it now. My arms are holding you, tor and tj tightly. I miss you so much!!!
Nichole Bowers says:
October 17, 2008 at 4:19 pm -
Sharon~ I was reading your post from the other day, and I just wanted to let you know I think you are an amazing mom. Definitly one of a kind just like Jacquie. I think everything you did and everything your still doing for Jax is incredible. I was thinking also about what you said about her favorite food places and Im sure because Jax couldn’t have those things everyday that when she was given the ok it made it that more special! Cuz we all know how much she loves her food! I know all us girls admire you and of course Jacquie. I’m thinking of you everyday. Always here if need anything. Love always, Nichole Love you and missing you Tink
Sandra says:
October 17, 2008 at 4:10 pm -
I miss you.
Anonymous says:
October 17, 2008 at 11:02 am -
Jax, I miss you tons and still think about you constantly… To the Hirsch family, Keep on getting through the days and leaning in each other for support. You are doing amazing…
alicia says:
October 17, 2008 at 10:19 am -
One more thing, I am going to post some of the lyrics from Coldplay’s song “Fix You.” I have been listening to it a lot lately… the lead singer, Chris Martin, wrote it for Gwyneth Paltrow when her father passed away and she was beside herself. For you Sharon, Torey, and TJ, I know there is no “fixing you” that can take place… but I know ALL of us hope that we can eventually help make your days a little easier and help push you forward through each day. We all love you so much!!!”When you try your best but you don’t succeedWhen you get what you want but not what you needWhen you feel so tired but you can’t sleep Stuck in reverse.And the tears come streaming down your face When you lose something you can’t replace When you love someone but it goes to waste Could it be worse?Lights will guide you home And ignite your bonesAnd I will try to fix you”xoxoxo <3 alicia <3 xoxoxoxo
alicia says:
October 17, 2008 at 10:11 am -
Sharon, first I want to respond to your post on October 14th. I am with everyone, that was such a heartwrenching post to read, but I am so grateful that you are able to express those feelings to all of us. Anyway, for lack of a better saying, I believe in situations like these you are sort of d*mned if you do and d*mned if you don’t. You question the actions and choices you made in regard to Jacquie’s choice… but of course you will, its only natural to wonder “what if I had let her have whatever she wanted.” But you have to realize, if you had let Jac eat out at Mighty, have McDonalds chicken nuggets, see her friends that were sick… deep down you know what would have come of that, probably a very very sick Jacquie way earlier on, and if that happened, and if the outcome were still the same, you know that you would be feeling 100000000x worse about your choices and actions. You were Jacquie’s BFF, but first and foremost you were acting as her MOTHER! The book she gave you is “Why a Daughter Needs a Mom” not “Why a Daughter Needs a BFF”. I don’t know if there is a quote in the book that is like what I am about to say, “A daughter needs a Mom to be a Mom and make the tough decisions for her even if they aren’t the most desired decisions.”Its the same thing as when we are 16 years old and whine and cry and throw hissy fits because our horrible mothers who care & love us so much that they are giving us a curfew of midnight, instead of 2 am. But the difference is, at that age you can’t always tell that your parents are doing it because they love you and want to keep you as safe as possible. In your case with Jacquie, she knew deep down that your decisions and actions were the right ones, and essentially, the only ones. She just needed you to act as her caring, protective mother, and say, sorry no McDonalds, and even if you’re tired you must do your exercises.So a long story short, Sharon you were the best BFF AND Mom to Jacquie… she could have not imagined a better person fit for the dual job title! They were tough decisions you, Torey & TJ had to make everyday, and that is part of the reason why we all admire you guys so much… you made so many tough decisions that I am sure many of us wonder if we could have made the same.Keep hanging in there, keep pushing on, you guys are all doing so well. I love you all so much!xoxoxo <3 alicia <3 xoxoxoxoxo
Sara (albuquerque) says:
October 17, 2008 at 9:59 am -
Hi, Now I know why yesterday was one of those tougher days where the tears were filling to the brim, it was a landmark date. All last night as I drove to the hospital where I volunteer in the NICU what kept repeating in my mind was “it is just not fair, it is just not right and it makes me sad”. Jacquie was amazingly strong in so many ways and she truly did win with each step of her treatment!!!! Jacquie- I still believe, but boy are you missed in this world!! Sharon, Torey and TJ- I will always believe in you! Sara and family
Michael Stoughton says:
October 17, 2008 at 9:40 am -
I’m not known for the softer side or the expressin g my feelings much sharon , your message two days ago broke my heart… what if what if what if… that eats us alive, trying to answer the unanwserable… just know that i think the same about things all the time…no solice i know, but it is my gut… stoughton love from the southwest
Huer says:
October 17, 2008 at 8:51 am -
Good Morning Sharon, Last night Jes, Cait, Sandra and I got together for a little girls only night. And our conversations led to you and Jacquie. We talked about alot of things and even though the conversations brought someteary eyes, our memories of Jacquie are so strong and the love we have for her is even stronger. I can’t take your pain away, and trust me I wish I could. But I can keep reminding you that Jacquie (your Angel and ours) will never ever be forgotten. We talk about her daily, think of her more and promise to do whatever we can to keep her memory alive. We are the best ciao bella believers ever!! xoxo Ashley
Kerri says:
October 16, 2008 at 11:08 pm -
Jacquie, I miss you sooooo much! The last time I wrote to you and was having a horrible day because I couldn’t stop crying about you…you came to me in my dreams and it was honestly the first time that I thought I got a “message” from you. Well today is another one of those days where I can’t get the tears to stop. The closer the holidays get the more I believe life sucks! My favorite part about holidays was getting together with the family…and I really only wanted to go to family parties if you were going to be there. Now you’re not going to be there and I don’t want to be there either! This is sooo stupid!!!! I would give ANYTHING to have you back and healthy again! There will always be a hole in this family now…just like the hole in my heart. Sometimes I get chest pains because I cry so hard. I just want to see you and talk to you and laugh with you. The last time I wrote to you and begged you to come to me, you did through my dreams that night…and when i woke up, it was the first time since you passed away that i felt a little bit at peace. I started to feel like you really are ok. But now, just like your mom, I’m starting to have doubts again. What if you’re lonely, or scared, or sad…Please come to me again! Even if it is through a dream…I need to know that you’re happy and smiling and laughing and being the Jacquie that we all hold so dear to our hearts. I need reassurance from you that you’re at peace. I have so many things I want to say to you. Please, Jax please come visit me! I love you sooooo much and miss you more than words could ever say!!! Loving and missing you always,Cousin Kerri
Anonymous says:
October 16, 2008 at 10:49 pm -
Sharon, I read your post last night and thought about what you had written all night. I just couldn’t come up with the right words, I’m still not sure I have. I guess there will always be those unanswered questions and second guesses, but what you need to know is that you are a mother and mothers do everything humanly possible to protect, love, teach and satisfy their children. You raised an incredibe daughter and did everything you could to make her happy. You always looked out for her best interest even though jacquie may have not thought so at the time, but really you did. So don’t you dare think for a minute you let her down or did something wrong. instead think about the amazing daughter you raised. heck, why do you think we all miss her so much. You are a great mother Sharon, and everytime you have a doubt just think about the impact jacquie has made on all of us and how pround we all are to say that we know her and that we love her and miss her. my heart achs for you because I just wish that you don’t have to deal with this pain, I wish I could just take it all away. I know I can’t and it’s not that easy. I just wish there was a way. Just know that we love you always and are here whenever you need a hug, a smile, or someone to lean on. always thinking about you guys and sending all my love and strength. <3333 Whitney ps. I had my first official observation today. I was teaching fifth grade english. I was so nervous but ended up doing a good job. Later when I was talking to my teacher I couldn’t help but giggle a little and smile, the first time in my life I actually tried to teach a kid something was almost eight years ago one Saturday morning, yep, when I was jacquie’s assistant. sometimes in a way I think she was one of the reasons I wanted to be a teacher or maybe torey since he offered me a job, but mostly jax for showing me how to be a good teacher. Thanks Jax, I owe you one.<3
Jennifer Warnes says:
October 16, 2008 at 4:19 pm -
Dear Sharon, I read your update yesterday, and I took your thoughts with me throughout the day to digest your feelings. I suppose anyone who loves their child would wonder and second guess the same things. As much as we want to protect them, we also want to give them the simple joys that will make them happy. I would have done the same as you if Jacquie were my daughter. It’s part of a mother’s love to protect and care for her child first and foremost. We always have to make sure that the playground is safe before we can let them run free. It’s part of the job as a mom. You are a remarkable person. As much as you tried to protect and care for Jacquie, you and Torey and Tj still did many things for Jacquie to attempt to bring some sort of normalcy into the life altering sickness she was cpoing with. Think back to Jacquie’s birthday party at Roswell. You invited so many friends an loved ones to share in her day. Think about the family times you shared together watching that Tuesday night TV show that made Jacquie laugh. You made a point of watching that show every week so Jacquie could have an hour of laughter and forget everything else. There are many other things that youu and Torey and TJ did to make Jacquie smile. Again, I completely understand that you may have days where you question yourself, but PLEASE remind yourself of the times when you brought that beautiful smile to Jacquie’s face. Even with what she was dealing with, you were able to bring her a smile with the gift of your love. That’s the best gift a mother could give. You did it ALL right. Jacquie is proud of you. Believe. Love, Jennifer, xoxoxo
Sara (albuquerque) says:
October 16, 2008 at 1:51 pm -
Always thinking of you and about you and missing you all. I am thinking about Jacquie’s light up the room smile and it makes my heart smile. To Amber from Geneseo… as your former coach, who knew you since you were so young…you have grown up into a fine young woman and you have written beautiful things to the Hirschs. I am proud of you!! Love and hugs and hand holds from way out here in NM!!! Sara
Dan says:
October 16, 2008 at 11:26 am -
cmd says:
October 16, 2008 at 12:11 am -
Sharon- Anyone who knows you (and Jacquie knew you best of all), knows you did everything in your power to protect Jacquie. You did all those things because you love your daughter. You should never second guess the things you did out of love.”A mother is she who can take the place of all others but whose place no one else can take.” – Cardinal MermillodYou were everything Jacquie needed you to be.
missy says:
October 15, 2008 at 11:41 pm -
Dear Sharon, Please don’t second guess yourself on anything you did for Jacquie over this past year. You did an incredible job not only caring for her, but loving her with all of your heart. Every no, Every yes, Every choice, Every decision, was made out of the purest kind of love and concern anyone could have for another. Jacquie knows how much you love her and it showed in everything you did for her. Everything you did mattered and made a difference for Jacquie for the better. You were the constant in her life everyday. You were her strength, her confidant, her protector, her friend, her mother. You fought right along side of her and are still fighting through her foundation. Please dont ever feel like you should have done this or that. You are an outstanding mother who did whatever it took. Jacquie knows that and loves you so much for it. Sharon, please see how much you helped Jacquie and know how much everything you did for her made a difference. Know how much you are loved and if I can do anything to help you with ANYTHING please let me. Its when its the hardest that you must believe the strongest. Sending prayers of strength. Believing in you, Missy
Pauline Cantatore says:
October 15, 2008 at 10:47 pm -
Hi Sharon, I was sad to see that you are having such a rough day. If it were not for you, Jacquie’s life would never have been complete. We all know how important you were to her and it was ever evident in your love and care for her during her illness. You did the best you could for her because you BELIEVED!!! That is why you NEEDED to do the things that you did for her. Your unwavering care for her will never go in vain! Again, it is okay to be angry, and we will all have doubts and regrets…but Jacquie didn’t have ANY…and she would never want you to have any either! I am going to ’light the night’ tomorrow not only for Jacquie, but for you, and Torey, and T.J.! I hope your day tomorrow is a little brighter! My thoughts and prayers are with you always!<3Pauline
Wendy Valvo says:
October 15, 2008 at 8:25 pm -
Hi Sharon – your post this morning saddened my heart. As a health care provider for over 30 years, I have seen first hand the horrors of cancer. Jacquie beat the odds and lived longer than most with that wretched disease because of the love of her Mom! You did everything right, everything a parent should do to protect and nurture her child. Hindsight is always 20/20 – it is so easy to second guess your motives after the fact. Please don’t do that to yourself – it does nothing but cause more grief and heartache. Our children need their Moms most during an illness, and you were there constantly for Jacquie. Remember all the wonderful moments you shared and don’t let the “what if’s” cloud those memories. Take care and stay strong. Wendy
Caitlin Burgher says:
October 15, 2008 at 4:19 pm -
Sharon, you did everything above and beyond what any mother would do for her child..and never in a bad way. You protected her while she was being attacked, you took all procautions and never chanced the health or safety of Jacquie..i am so thankful to you for doing so and wouldn’t have had it any other way..i know she feels the same! You’re an amazing mother and as horrible as an experience as it was you and Jacquie laughed the whole way through..never doubt or regret your decisions they were the right ones! Im sorry for your rough days, you made Jacquie so happy even when it looked impossible.
amber from geneseo says:
October 15, 2008 at 4:17 pm -
Sharon, Again, i can say that i never even met jacquie, but from posts i feel like i knew her very well. from what i’ve read, i don’t think she could have ever been disappointed or angry by the way you protected her. what you did was NOT in vain. you fufilled your duties as a great mother, and i’m sure jacquie was more than thankful for that. while everything you did could not save her from her disease, it did make your time with her that much more special. because of these posts, i am forced everyday to count my blessings…i cannot thank jacquie enough for this gift to me. i am constantly reminding myself that little arguments with my own parents, siblings, and fiancee are so unnecessary, and i am just thankful for their presence in my life. thank you for recording jacquie’s story as it has made me a better person. keep BELIEVING and stay STRONG
Joe D says:
October 15, 2008 at 3:25 pm -
Sharon,Dont beat yourself up over things you did to help jax. you did the best you knew, you are an amazing parent. I sure she had great comfort knowing how much you really cared… as we all did.Your family has taught me so much about my own life, and everything in it. thank you so much for that
Sara (albuquerque) says:
October 15, 2008 at 12:35 pm -
Sharon, Squeeze your hand and know that I am with you. Jacquie….it is more than excruciatingly painfully hard for everyone, because you possess such beautiful, unique qualities.You have quite a family! Torey, TJ and Sharon- take a breath and hang in and hang on. Thinking of you. Sara
Angela says:
October 15, 2008 at 11:16 am -
aunt sharon, as i read your message this morning i felt that i needed to tell you that jax may have hated to take some meds or wear her mask, and yes she probably would have liked an extra trip to mighty taco BUT all you did for her was for a reason and just because things didnt turn out the way we had all expected you did everything right and she appreciated it! she loved her bff and wouldnt have changed a singel thing that you did for her!!!!! i love you so much and am missing jacquie everyday as well! please know that i am here! i love you all, cousin angela
alicia says:
October 15, 2008 at 11:14 am -
i don’t think that links work on here, but you can copy & paste this and watch it.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qoGa84U5hDo&NR=1
alicia says:
October 15, 2008 at 11:10 am -
I run for hopeI run to feelI run for the truthFor all that is realI run for your mother your sister your wifeI run for you and me my friendI run for lifeAnd someday if they tell you about itIf the darkness knocks on your doorRemember her remember meWe will be running as we have beforeRunning for answersRunning for moreI run for lifei love you.
aunt val says:
October 15, 2008 at 10:48 am -
i’m here, i feel so still, as if time has stopped. maybe somewhere it has…………. jacquie i am still holding you and your mom and dad and tj tightly. i will never let go.
Sadie says:
October 15, 2008 at 10:18 am -
Oh Sharon, Your post today just broke my heart. Especially because the girls and I have been talking about very similar things. When we saw Jax just a few months ago when she got to go home we didn’t hug her – we didn’t want to because we didn’t want to risk giving her any germs at all. If we had known what we know now would we have hugged her so tight… of course we would have. But then we still would have wondered… was it our hugs? There will always be questions. It’s easy to say that you just can’t think like that but it is not so easy to do – you can’t control how you think or how you feel and so of course these questions are going to come into your mind. We all believed with such conviction that there would be a different outcome – we were not being naive, we knew that what she had was bad but we all just kept believing with all of our hearts that the world wouldn’t be so unfair as to take her away from us. You did exactly what you needed to do – you took care of your daughter and fiercely protected her. You are an amazing Mom. You are wondering if any of it mattered… it did. It didn’t do what we all hoped and believed it would but it certainly mattered. You were and are Jacquie’s BFF, her Mom, her warden… by protecting her and caring for her the way you did you grew the amazing bond between you two. She knew that you would go to the ends of the earth for her so yes it definitely mattered. She needed you there to protect her and though she may have wanted those other things, fast food etc. she knew she needed you and she was so honored to have you as her mother protecting her with all you had. I remember talking to her around Mother’s day and her telling me what a great Mom you are. She also said “A lot of girls would go crazy constantly being with their Moms but I’m good. I’m good with just me and my Mom.” So Sharon yes you did everything you could to be there for and protect your daughter. And oh imagine if you had not protected her the way that you did, the questions that you have now would be different and worse. You did exactly what you needed to do and it certainly mattered. I am thinking of you all everyday and of course Jacquie – constantly and always, she is in my heart. I love you guys. <3 Sadie
Huer says:
October 15, 2008 at 8:41 am -
Sharon, I am always thinking about you, everyday you go through my mind. Losing a child has to be the most difficult thing in the world, no one should have to go through it. I spent as much time as I could with Jax during her battle, and you know what through all of our conversations, all of the laughter and tears and anger, she never once said “I wish my Mom would…” The care you gave her, the rules you set were what gave her the strength she had to fight as long as she did. She fought HARD for almost a year. Mrs. Fassl once told me that she had asked Jacquie if it was okay if she took you to lunch and you know what? Jacquie told her no, Jacquie wanted you around because you kept her safe, you kept her going, you kept her laughing, you gave her everything she needed. Regret is something that is easy to have, and losing hope at times is easy too. Days of not being able to Believe are to be expected. But please don’t spend more than 1 sec thinking you weren’t the best darn Warden, Nurse, BFF or Mommy to Jacquie!! love you. xo-Believing-xo Ashley
Casey Stiokas says:
October 14, 2008 at 9:58 pm -
Sharon, The ribbon necklace that we gave to Jax is a Strong Women necklace, and it is our wish that you wear it now. You are astrong woman, one of the strongest I know, and it would make us extremely proud for you to continue wearing that necklace. It proudly showed the world that my mom was brave after fighting her cancer, and it will show the world that you too are brave after battling this horrible disease, because we both know that you have also fought. Regain strength through the knowledge that we ALL love you and are standing right behind you, ready to catch you should you stumble. Torey and TJ, You too are always in my thoughts and prayers. Not a day goes by that I don’t think about how you are doing, and how amazingly strong you were for Jax through everything. You too must remain strong and know that we love you dearly. Jax, Dad isn’t even kidding about the banana peels, and they are being thrown down the roads of New Jersey and even Canada too on occasion. I see your smile and hear your laugh whenever I think about retelling that story in July. It saddens me, but it also makes me smile, because I know you were happy at that point and I’m glad I could help you laugh. A year ago, you were asking me how solo week was going, when I should have been asking you the same question. I love you Jax, and I miss the living crap out of you every single day, but I know, that some day I’ll get to see you again, and that brings me some comfort. God Bless beautiful girl, and fly high. Love you always, Casey
Sadie says:
October 14, 2008 at 9:46 pm -
Just wanted to say I love you. I’m seeing Tinkerbell everywhere and knowing that Jacquie is everywhere too. <3
Max says:
October 14, 2008 at 6:45 pm -
missy says:
October 14, 2008 at 6:32 pm -
Hi Sharon, I agree we so many others in saying Jacquie must be so proud of you! Your strength and courage is an inspiration every day! Please know there is not a day that goes by that I dont pray for God to be right next to you. Believing Missy
Caitlin Burgher says:
October 14, 2008 at 4:10 pm -
Hello family, Just a thought if you havn’t seen it, theres a new show call Hole in the wall or The hole. Something. But it reminded me of Jacquie and her love of crazy, embarrissing TV shows, its one she’d love im sure. Its on Fox..what else, and is pretty corny inbetween but watching people attempts to fit through strange shapes half the time too small to fit through in the first place makes me laugh and i can Jax in the room when i watch it laughing..hard! your daughter/sister had the Loudest most Contageous laugh ever!!!
alicia says:
October 14, 2008 at 12:50 pm -
Hello beautiful… so I was studying and listening to some music and a song that i haven’t heard in ages came on, and surprise surprise, it reminded me of you. its by none other than the wise tom petty. “And some things are overSome things go onAnd part of me you carryPart of me is goneBut you got a heart so bigIt could crush this townAnd I can’t hold out foreverEven walls fall down”loving you forever beautiful. xoxoxoxoxxo<3 alicia <3
Sara (albuquerque) says:
October 14, 2008 at 11:33 am -
This morning as I stared at 3 photos of Elise, for school, the image of Elise suddenly became a vision of Jacquie at this age with her hair pulled back, wearing the jean jacket I remember so vividly and standing there with that SMILE. My eyes filled with tears, and I had to catch my breath. Missing and caring and thinking about you, all of you.
Athena says:
October 14, 2008 at 9:03 am -
Dear Sharon, Torey and TJ Not a day goes by that I don’t think of Jacquie and her wonderful family. Eventhough your hearts are broken, Jacquie would be so proud of how much love you are showing and how strong you truly are. This website is a blessing and has helped countless people mourn the loss of such a wonderful daughter. Sharon, your last message was just beautiful. It really made me stop and appreciate everything I have in my life. Sometimes we get so caught up in the day to day activities we forget what is truly important. I thank you for reminding me to treasure the time with my family, friends and loved ones. I was so happy to read you are planting a flower garden for Jacquie. That will be a special place that you can recount all the great memories and feel closer to her. Gardening is good therapy also! I’m glad you mentioned that it doesn’t take time or money to make the world a happier place. I try to remember that everyday when I visit my mother in the memory care unit at Brompton. I try to do a good deed everyday for one of the residents. It really makes me feel better knowing that somehow I brightened their day. Jacquie’s love for life is being passed on through our good deeds. She is everywhere. I hope you have a good day today. Love, Athena
Huer says:
October 14, 2008 at 8:38 am -
Good Morning, Sharon thank you for writing such beautiful posts. I hope writing them helps you as much as reading them helps me. I miss Jax so much, I keep two pictures of just her and I on my dresser, one from middle school and one from last summer. Every morning I look at them and think of Jacquie. I think of how much I love her and am lucky to have such a wonderful friend. I believe she is with me (us) and really helping guide us everyday. I love you all and hope that you have a peaceful day full of happy memories of Jacquie. xoxo…always believing Ashley
Anonymous says:
October 14, 2008 at 7:26 am -
Sharon, Torey ,TJ, You have found the perfect way to honor Jacquie .As the flowers bloom each new year it reminds you of her continuing love and faithfulness to family and friends. Only god could make a flower and a life as special as Jacquie’s. May you find comfort as He cares for her now and in the strength and support of all those who love you. We think of you daily. Marcia and family
Max says:
October 14, 2008 at 7:17 am -
Kim says:
October 14, 2008 at 5:44 am -
I miss you Jax, I think of you all the time. So many things bring you to mind. You are a one of a kind and greatly missed. Just wanted to let you know how much you are loved!!!!
Liz Fassl says:
October 13, 2008 at 9:59 pm -
Hi Sharon, Torey and TJ,I just wanted to let you know that I’m still thinking about you and Jacquie. I have the last note she wrote me up on my dresser so I can see it every day and think of her. I know she is looking down at all of us and helping us through each day. -Liz
missy says:
October 13, 2008 at 6:06 pm -
Dear Sharon, Today was a day sent by Jacquie! The sun was shinning as bright as her smile. The warmth of the sun, as warm as her heart. The gentle breeze as light as her laugh. The colors of the trees as bold as her courage. The smell in the air as sweet as herself. This beautiful day, from a beautiful girl. Today was a day sent by Jacquie! Always BELIEVING Missy
alicia says:
October 13, 2008 at 5:05 pm -
this sunshine and weather is beautiful, thank you jacquie. sharon, i am consistently blown away by your eloquence… you are able to put thoughts and feelings into words in a way that most people could only dream of. as i always found that jacquie was comforting us or making us laugh when i thought it should be us comforting her or making her laugh – i am finding that sharon, you and your words comfort me in a way most things can’t… and yet again i feel as though we need to be/should be the ones comforting you. it is obvious that while so many of jacquie’s shining, remarkable qualities are qualities that are unique to her in their own way, are also shared by you Sharon, Torey, and TJ. I understand where Jacquie learned and was taught such selflessness, caring, and thoughtfulness (among so many others). keep hanging in there, doing whatever you must to get through each day. i love you all.<3 alicia <3 p.s. I think that the idea of a garden for Jacquie is wonderful. Before my dad passed, he planted a few clematis in various areas of the yard. And as each spring arrives, I try my best to maintain them so I can see them bloom. When they bloom they are just so beautiful, bright purple flowers. Anyway, I don’t think I have developed a green thumb yet because I have trouble with them... maybe sometime Sharon you can give me a few pointers, and we can work on Jacquie’s garden together, then I can bring the knowledge and love that you taught me and transfer it to my Dad’s clematis. I love you. xoxo
sue says:
October 13, 2008 at 4:20 pm -
sharon, i don’t know how you find such beautiful things to say. jacquie will be with you every step of the way martha and she will help you with your decision making. jax, i love you, i think of you always and you will forever be in my heart
Another Believer says:
October 13, 2008 at 1:47 pm -
I got my Jacquie for ALL bracelet in the mail today. I also got the post-card with a little personal note on it… and it really made me wish I had contributed sooner. I think I felt like because I didn’t know Jacquie well, I didn’t belong in her struggle with the people who cared about her most. I felt like I wasn’t allowed to be that sad about it. And since last month, I realized that’s the stupidest thing ever. This web site, your posts, have let us in on a deeply personal level, and I couldn’t thank you more for that. It made me feel welcome to fight for Jacquie, and now I’ll do my part in her memory.I’ll wear my bracelet proudly – Jacquie, your memory shines here, too. May God keep you and your unbelievable family. You are all so loved.
Moo says:
October 13, 2008 at 1:24 pm -
i am sorry for not writing as often as i feel i should. everyday i wake up and say, “i should read jacquie’s website.” but i find it so difficult to read about how angry and hurt my family is, including myself. this isn’t fair and i try so hard everyday to live my life, but i can’t. and i’m finding it hard to keep going without my dearest cousin and friend. everyone has their own way of dealing with death. some days are better than others, but none are “great” or even “good” at this point. i miss you, jax! is this empty feeling ever going to fade? i will never forget you and you will always be apart of me….in my heart and soul….forever and ever….i still believe! i love u!
Sara (albuquerque) says:
October 13, 2008 at 11:44 am -
Jacquie, Never forgetting…always remembering… you!! Sharon, Torey, TJ- I believe in YOU. Sara
Anonymous says:
October 13, 2008 at 9:59 am -
Hirsch Family, The best part about Geneseo is the Greek community… really what we should call ourselves is the Greek family. I hope you realize how Jacquies death was truly a loss not just for you, or for the SDT’s but to the entire Greek community. We, at Geneseo, pride ourselves on knowing everyone and knowing that every Greek organization is just a piece of the Greek community. It was incredible to see how every organization really stepped up when Jacquie was first diagnosed. The lines that we stood in for the cheek swab to see if we were a match for the bone marrow transplant, donations each organization made and kind words we had for each other. It was incredible as an alumni to hear the wonderful things my organization did for the SDT’s and said to them after Jacquies death. I have never been so proud to be Greek. Her struggle really reminded Geneseo greeks how much we do care about each other and about our own brothers and sisters in our organizations. Thanks for the reminder Jax! My thoughts and prayers are you with you Hirsch family, friends and SDT’s.
Anonymous says:
October 13, 2008 at 9:55 am -
Just wanted to let you know I’m thinking about all of you, and i love you<3 love always, meg dressel
Max says:
October 13, 2008 at 4:13 am -