Its been a year since Jax called me on my way to school to tell me the news. I cried then, and I still cry today, but I will always be a Believer. Love and miss you always Jax. -Casey
Jacquie,I think about you ALL the time and am forever believing in the strength you are giving ALL of us down here. You have the absolute most amazing family in the entire world and they are needing some your unbelievable strength now more than ever.I will forever be believing you…
I find myself thinking of you more and more each day. Everything reminds me of you. This past couple of weeks, I swear I’ve seen 2 shooting stars. I don’t think I’ve seen 2 shooting stars in my entire life…that’s how I know that you’re up there watching over me and everyone who loves you. For the first shooting star sighting I was on my way to Maryland and rather frustrated as I had gotten off track and my GPS was of no assistance as it was “searching for satellites”. I was about to enter panic mode when suddenly I saw your star and I knew that you were there for me as you have been so many times before…thanks for that, I’m not sure that I would have made it without you! Sharon, Torey & T.J. I hope that you continue to find comfort in each other and know that Jacquie will continue to be your strength. Torey- I hope that you will finish Jacquie’s park and I know that she is there with you as you are speaking to her!
my heart hurts when I am missing you so bad. So many things I want to tell you. I wish we could have you back. I hope you & my dad are taking care of each other up there, maybe he is teaching you some lacrosse moves, and you are teaching him the importance of Vera bags and Abercrombie tees. everything just seems to have lost its flavor without you… the sun doesn’t shine so bright anymore, the smell of fall isn’t as crisp, and music just doesn’t mean what it used to. i hope in time these things will return to the state that they once were… until then, please shine down on us beautiful girl… lord knows we have had some horrible days behind us and some very tough ones lay ahead. help us to be strong for ourselves and more importantly, strong for each other. it is almost unbearable being here without you, so keep on throwing us signs, don’t ever stop letting us know you are all around. TJ, Torey, Sharon, keep hanging in there. We love you guys so much. Just as Jacquie means the world to me, you all have come to mean the same. I am so grateful that I got to meet and befriend as wonderful people as you. Sharon, I have been having a really hard time dealing with this… I have been experiencing acute anxiety and even panic attacks (which I have never had before in my life). Since then I have started advanced pilates and yoga classes and have seem a dramatic improvement in my breathing and coping. I know yoga might sound silly and new age or what have you, but when you feel up to it (in weeks, months, heck even years) I really suggest trying it out… and if you want a buddy to do it with, you know I am only a text or a phone call away.Hang tight everyone, I love you all so much. And beautiful girl, god how I miss you. I am trying to hard to be good, to be patient with others, to not get upset by little things, to enjoy everything life has to offer (which includes the nuisances and bad days). But sometimes it is so hard, I just get so sad and mad. I miss you! I love you all and am BELIEVING<3 alicia <3
Sharon, Torey and TJ,Today like every single other day, I have started my day with a prayer and will say many more before the sun sets. Throughout the day, I think of you and hope that you are finding strength and that it doesn’t hurt just to breathe.
Thinking of you every single second. I love you guys and am so glad we get to all be together this weekend. It will be hard and we will be angry (furious) and sad (devastated) and it is okay to feel all of those things. Jacquie was someone who always felt her feelings and allowed us in to feel them with her. She’d want us to feel our feelings too – and I know she is so proud of her amazing parents and brother. We will be there soon to lean on. I love you guys and I am always believing that Jacquie shows us that she is with us still.<3 Sadie
I admire you all so much for your non-stop courage and belief… She seems like she was an amazing human being, and I feel affected because it’s so close to home. I am from Alden just 15 mins from williamsville and I want you to know I have donated blood every year! don’t stop believin <3 xoxo Janelle
Just letting you all know how much I think of you each day. Always loving and believing in you all. I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers everyday. love always, amanda
Dearest Sharon, Torey & TJ ~ As I continue to faithfully read this beautiful website, I’m writing to you with absolutely no idea what to say… I just wanted you to know that my family and I continue to pray for you each and every day as you work so very hard to put one foot in front of the other… Don’t ever give up ~ you have way too many people counting on you! Just like Jacquie, we need you to keep teaching us… All our love ~ Elise, Martin, Quintin, Aidan, Gabriel & Fiona
It’s not fair, it doesn’t seem possible. One year ago. Walking must have been so very difficult, but I know Jacquie was watching, looking down, and touching you with her heart. She is here with you, she is. We just want her here physically, and yes, it’s not fair that she isn’t. But look for signs of her presence, I do believe that there are signs. I’ve experienced this . Jax would want you to be happy and live, we all know this, but it’s hard to do right now. Take the time to feel her, grieve, experience both the happy and sad moments and reflect. Love is a gift, one that makes us all so very happy, fullfilled. Grief happens because we love. It is the hardest thing we go through but without it we wouldn’t have had all the wonderful aspects of love. So, each day we all must ride our own personal rollercoaster. With the healing nature of time, it will be possible to live in the way Jacquie would want you to! With so much love, understanding, Indie
I guess I just first want to say how sorry I am that I have not written on Jacquies wall in a very long time. Truthfully it is not that I havent been reading it , its just that everytime I try to write something I burst out into uncontrollable tears. I have probably tried to write a message or a letter to Jacquie & family over a hundred times and would find myself staring at a blank screen. Even now it has been 15 minutes since I have started to type and still cannot gather my thoughts. I want to say a thousand things. I want to say how sorry I am to Sharon, Torey and T.J., I want to say how much I love and miss Jacquie and how there isnt a second that goes by that I dont think about her or wish that this was all a bad dream. But like I said on the 11th I have never been good with words and I dont expect to be now. Looking back on the last 3 weeks I guess everything didnt really didnt hit me until I came to Spain on the 14th. I had come to Buffalo so sudden on the 5th and I feel like my life from then until now is a huge cloud. I remember being there at the hospital and at every service and comprehending what was going on, but I guess I just didnt really understand what this all meant. I had lost my best friend, (although nothing like your relationship with her, Sharon) still someone who I had called my best friend for years. Someone who I trusted my entire heart with. Like many I presume I still cant believe that this is all true. My heart is broken into a thousand little pieces and I just cant see them coming back together. I had never lost someone close to me, ever. I had never felt this feeling before. This feeling of deep sadness that at times cripples me. I know that Jacquie would all want us to go on and live normal lives and to stop wasting so much time on her, but the fact is that Jacquie… you were our lives. You were a huge part of mine and of many others. You could never and will never be replaced. Life without you just doesnt seem real. Like Sharon, I too was not done making memories with you. We still had so many to make; going out, shopping, dancing the night away, chasing boys and finishing school together. We were even supposed to adopt kids together. Jax, being at school will never be the same. The sorority without you will never be the same. My life without you will never be the same. I hate that this happened and I know that I am supposed to learn and grow from this, but right now its just too hard. Its too hard to even let people know how I am feeling. I dont want to seem weak but I feel like if I dont let this out then I will just continue to get worse and worse. Jacquie, You were, are and will always be my teammate, my sister and my best friend. You were the reason why I joined the sorority and stayed at Geneseo. You made life sweet and comforting. You were the best friend that I was looking for and I hope that I was the one you had always wanted. I love you with all my heart and miss you more than I can say. love always, Justine
Jacquie,It’s been just over a year now and our family has been turned upside down. This is killing each and everyone of us inside not having you here with us. I’ve been having such a hard time with everything. I don’t know how to stop thinking about you. I think about you constantly everyday…and there still hasn’t been a day that I haven’t cried. I don’t know how you stayed so strong because I can’t. I am so full of hatred right now! I hate the world for taking you away from us…I hate the time I won’t get to spend with you anymore…I hate the memories we won’t get to make in the future…I hate knowing that I didn’t get enough time with you to tell you just how much we all needed you and can’t do this without you…I hate that other people survived this stupid disease and you didn’t…I just hate everything right now and I don’t know if those feelings will ever go away. I want to see you and talk to you and hug you. I need you to tell me that you’re ok and that you’re still with us. Please give me a sign! I miss you sooooo much! There’s a part of me that truly believes that you’re still reading these messages, so when you get to this one, please consider visiting me to let me know you’re ok. Forever and always you are in my heart and in my thoughts! I love you so much! Love always,Cousin Kerri
For all of us who were lucky enough to know Jacquie, we are forever changed. With all the pain being felt we should try to remember that it is only so bad because of the amazing person of jacquie hirsch. Is it really only one year ago? With what jax endured over the past 12 months that seems impossible. Sharon. torey and tj, my heart aches for you. Please let us help. Jax, I miss you and know that you need to help a lot of people down here who are suffering and missing you. I love you!
dear jacquie, well im not sure but i think you said hi to me today! i was sitting at work minding my own buisness like i usually do, lol and a customer walked over to my window and i look up to see TINK!!! right in front of me spelled out large TINK….i really hope that was you saying hello to me! oh yea listen to this last nite i was bartending at dwyers and this guy came in with your braclet on….he said he sold a ton of them at some event at buffalo hills….you are everywhere and i miss you so much! i love you always sweet tink, cousin angela
Hirsch Family, You are constantly in my thoughts and prayers. Jacquie was in several of my education classes at Geneseo and was a part of my group for one of our class projects. Her smile could light up the room and she brought such a positive energy to everything she was involved in. I’m sorry that there are no words I can say to console you at this time. Just know that you (Sharon, Torey, and TJ) and Jacquie are always on my mind. I still check the website every day hoping for updates to read. Please know that this website has helped me to cope with the loss of Jacquie (a little). Always on my mind and forever in my heart.
the sun rises out here in phx…today for whatever reason was very different…it had these red streaks that looked like a real sun burst…it was so different i had to look at it longer than normal… i will b e going to albuquerque this weekend to see sara and the kids…looking forward to seeing them… wish i had words for each of you, but i dont…i wish i did… peace to all the hirsches…
You all have such courage and strength to walk in Jacquie’s footsteps and spread the love and caring that she showed to everyone she met. Torey you are strong and never falter as you give support to Sharon and TJ. Sharon you are the most couragous loving giving Mother. What an example you set for the world to see. Keeping you always in our prayers for continued courage and strength. Love Marcia
Hirsch’s – It’s difficult to know what to say…except that you are all thought of in sympathy and friendship. We miss knowing that Jax’s is here with us – and try to find comfort in her presence above. I truly can’t imagine how difficult it is for you. You are in our prayers – for comfort and peace. With expressions of deepest sympathy – Peggy
I cant stop thinking about you. You are still the most amazing and influential people that I have ever come across. I wish you were still here. I miss your smile and your laugh and your insane ability to quote movies.Love you and forever thinking about you and all the things I have learned from you.xoxo
Dear Sharon Torey and TJ., Please know how much we are thinking of you all. How proud Jacquie must have been, to watch over you as you walked Friday night. I cant even begin to know the strength that took. Sharon, Tory , you are wonderful parents, T.J. a wonderful brother. Not only were you Blessed to have such an incredible daughter but she was also blessed to have such a wonderful family as yours. Sending strength and so, so much love . Believing Missy
My family lived this hell and I understand all to well what you have gone through. Sully continues to fight everyday against this horrible disease and I will hold your daughters memory close to remind me that we can never lose sight of beating this. Your daughter and sister has also showed us that we must hold each other so close and love each other with everything we have.
Sharon, I myself do not feel ready to go to the walk this Friday so I have no idea the amount of strenght that it took for you all to go. I know it must be hard to look around and see the survivors and think how come not Jacquie…But just think that she would want to make her dream live on and not be mad. I know how hard that is because when they told me I had cancer I was mad..really mad. Who has a baby one month and then the next month gets told they have cancer. One day we will be ready to go to those walks and help the cause and make things that we have gone though hopefully easier for the next person to go through. You may have had a gold ballon but Jacquie and her fight will always live on. Sharon stay strong and believe in the fact that Jacquie will guide you and you family. Please lean on WHO EVER OFFERS it is not a sign of weakness, take there love and compassion and allow others to hear your memories of Jacquie, just try it maybe it might help alittle…If not don’t do it again. Baby steps and belief in the inner strenght that we all have inside of us even at our darkest hour. I will continue to include you and your family in my prayers. Christine
Sharon, Unable are the loved to die. For love is immortality. ~Emily Dickinson I can’t imagine how hard yesterday was for you. I think of Jacquie every single day, and yesterday I thought of her even more. I’ll never forget talking to Jacquie on 09/28/07. She was more concerned with how I was handling the news and how the rest of the girls would handle the news, then being upset. She always cared more about our well being then her own. The courage you showed by going to the Light the Night made Jacquie proud. The anger your feeling is normal, its hard to look at those happy people with their friends or daughters or sisters holding white balloons, while you were there holding a gold one. Cancer Stinks and isn’t fair. But your so strong and the fact that you got up to face those white balloons is amazing. Love you, always am believing. xoxo, Ashley
i am pretty sure that i think of writing on jac’s messageboard so much that i am convinced i wrote & posted messages and i go to see them and they’re not there.i love you all so much. a year ago today all of our lives were forever changed. one way that it forever changed all of us is that it made all of us stronger. i wish i had words to say to make you feel better. today is just a sh*tty d*mn day to say the least. i hate september 28th. but i love you all so much.and jacquie, you will allways be my hero, role model, and will be the love of my life!!!!!!!! no words to express what you mean to me.xoxoxo<3 alicia <3
today…the 28th..the phone call and things changed forever. i believed from the beginning that you would beat this disease my dear girl, up until the end i believed you would be ok. i ache for you brother, your dad and your mom…for every one who loves you. we all will love you forever dear girl. aunt val
hi to all, i hope that you are having a good night, and supporting each other. this message is for sharon though. sharon you are one of the strongest women i know. and i do believe that jacquie is there with you every step of the way. stay strong, and let those of us who knew and loved her and know and love each of you help in any way we can. because i believe that is what jax would want each of us to do, and what i know she would do in anyone’s shoes. i remember the days where we were teaching summer camp and the fun you, her, TJ, and i had with the kids and all the stuff we used to do. and the day where we had the team girls line dance for 3 hours- and oh god how sore i was the next day. i also remember how you were always there for me, like my mom away from home, and how much i always appreciated everything you did for me. so i want to say thank you to each of you, you never know how much this “lost girl from downstate new york” appreciated all you have done for me through the years. there is no way to ever show my gratitude to each of you, torey, sharon, tj and jax. please let me know if there is anything i can do. i love you all, keesha
TJ, I always love what you do with the website, even the smallest of changes are noticed and look great. You really have done an impressive job with it.Sharon and Torey, hello and hugs to you…Jacquie, missing you, thinking about you…Sue, once again I am with you. Did not have the theatre experience that you did but not too long ago Elise was sick with a temp and terrible sore throat etc.and as her mom I felt so badly for her and just wanted to make her better and I came downstairs in tears and said to my mom who was visiting…”my heart aches for her, she feels so bad and yet this is NOTHING compared to what Sharon and Jacquie have been going through” and just shook my head in a swirl of emotion about them and for them and still do, for the whole family. Love, Sara
One year ago today Jacquie began the fight of her life. Now we are honored to continue it for her forever. I’m thinking of you extra today – if that’s even possible as I think of you constantly. I love you guys and I know today is hard. Friday we will all be together fighting for Jacquie. Hold on to each other and we’ll be there soon to hold on to you too. Jacquie, we miss you so much. I keep replaying what you must have felt like one year ago and I am again amazed by your strength and courage. You have forever changed me and my life is better because you are in it. I love you. Thinking of all of you always, and of course, BELIEVING. <3 Sadie
Dear Sharon , Hoping this day brings you the brightness of Jacquie’s smile, and the strength of everyone who loves and believes in you. Believing Missy
Not a day goes by that I do not think of all of you. I wish there was anything someone would say to make all this pain go away. Today will probably be even harder as it has now been a year since this horrible disease was found within Jacquie. I pray that she is giving you all strength every single day and making you smile :)All my love and thoughts,Cassey Stallman
sharon, i am so proud of you for doing the walk. i really miss talking to you and hearing your voice so i will just continue to let you know that i am here and thinking of you (and jax, torey and tj). last night i took gia to a play and at the very end the lights go up and she turns to tell me that she doesn’t feel well. she then proceeded to throw up all over the auditorium seat, herself and me. as we were driving home, she says “mom, why can’t God use his power so that i am not sick?’’ (she is 5) once again, i had no answer. will we ever? she broke my heart as she spent the night sick about 7 more times and i can not even imagine the strength you had for jax over the last year. you are amazing! i love you
Dear Aunt Sharon:I can’t thank you enough for the letter you wrote to me and the girls. I know that wasn’t an easy thing to do. Just as you feel, I also find it so hard to find the right words to say. If there really are any at all?! I do believe that writing them does make it a little easier. I can’t imagine how you must feel, TJ and Uncle Torey, too. I know first hand, I saw it with my own two eyes, as did everyone else, the incredible bond that you and Jax shared together…and always will! Nothing can take that away from you. I miss her, too. A LOT! Not a day, not even a minute, goes by that I don’t think about her or a memory that I have with her. There are countless numbers of them. And they all make me smile, cuz that’s what Jacquie did best…make others smile and laugh. Everywhere I look, songs on the radio, the word “believe” seems to beeverywhere…Jax is still here with us everyday! She just appears a little different now, but that doesn’t mean that we still can’t talk to her or joke with her. I do everyday. I laugh with her, I cry with her, etc. I know she can hear me and she’s showed me that she hears me, too! You are truly an inspiration and Jacquie would be so proud of you! It is going to take a long time to heal, if ever, but our precious Tink is resting peacefully and watching over each of us. Her love and spirit will live in us all forever. I love you all so much and I am here for you if you need anything. Keep BELIEVING!!!
Jacquie, It’s been a year today since I physically saw you, but I wanted you to know that I see your smiling face daily. I know you’re smiling down on us and probably cracking jokes about all the things happening here… Do you think the Bills can go 4-0 tomorrow??? Love you.
just wanted to let you know i love you, and that i still believe.hey jax- someone was wearing a tinkerbell shirt the other day in school. i almost started to cry, but then i realized how tinkerbell is always smiling, just like you, and that made me happy 🙂 miss you and love you.
Hirsch’s, You are all in my thoughts and prayers everyday. I think about you all the time, and pray that Jacquie is giving you strength. My heart just aches for you all right now..please know I am here for you all and if you need anything do not hesitate. I know “the girls” and I are looking forward to the walk next weekend and seeing all you again. I love you all and keep you in my heart. Jacquie-I miss you and love you very much. I will keep you in my heart forever. I think about you and your family each and every day. I BELIEVE <3 Love always, Amanda
Dear Sharon Tory and T.J., I will be thinking of you as you walk tonight and I believe with all my heart Jacquie will be walking right beside you. All my strength and love. Missy
i think we need a laugh… i am in a construction trailer out here in az…the phone is hooked up and i get those telemarketers calling…your factory warranty is up…do you want digital cable…youve won a trip on a cruise line etc…can i speak to jerry anderson?… so i hang up or tell them this is a jobsite trailer on a construction site… the other day this happens…. angelone builders this is mike… can i speak to trailer jobsite? excuse me? can i speak to mr trailer jobsite? this is a construction trailer at a construction jobsite… thats what it says for first and last name, trailer jobsite…are you over 21 and would you be interested in the promotion for the legacy resort? i know she has a job that must be so horrible to ask those questions all day, but she really thought i was named trailer jobsite…think of this…someone had to type that name in at some point…last name, jobsite…first name, trailer its not as funny when i type it out but still funny i guess… i see jacquie calling me trailer from now on… peace to all
I’m sorry I can’t be at Light the Night with you in Roch today, but know I am with you in spirit, and will be physically present with you next week!Hang in there Sharon… and it is okay if you cry at the walk, there will be tons of people right beside you, with their hands waiting in case you need one to hold tight and squeeze. And can I just say how proud I am of you for getting out of the house and doing this walk? That takes a lot of guts, courage, and grace… and there is no doubt that beautiful Jacquie is looking down with her illuminating smile, so proud of you. You are doing so well, being so strong. I love you!<3 alicia <3
Hi Sharon, Just had to say from the moment I met you so long ago, I thought you were an awesome human being, I still think you are just so amazing inside and out!! Sara
Just saying hello. Today the sadness is back on the surface, ready to pour out. It was last night too. Sue, I am with you…if our sadness and pain is what it is for us, I can not even beigin to imagine how it is for Sharon, Torey, TJ and the rest of the family. I know this is one of those things I will never understand and never be able to make sense of and will always have sadness along with the happy memories and thoughts. I have said this before to my mom- how lucky I am to have known someone that saying goodbye to can be so hard. Hugs to you Sharon! Love, Sara
TJ, I googled that song that you heard on the radio and it is called “Hoe Down” from “Four Dance Episodes” from “Rodeo” written by Aaron Copland. I went to youtube and this is the best version I found: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cqah1rucyRgI’m listening to it right now at work and am loving every second of it. Jacquie was guiding you home last night, trying to ensure that you ate a deliciously yummy dinner!she is ALL around.i love you guys so much.xoxoxo <3 alicia <3 xoxoxoxoxo
Casey Stiokas says:
October 1, 2008 at 1:11 pm -
Its been a year since Jax called me on my way to school to tell me the news. I cried then, and I still cry today, but I will always be a Believer. Love and miss you always Jax. -Casey
Pinchoff says:
October 1, 2008 at 11:53 am -
Jacquie,I think about you ALL the time and am forever believing in the strength you are giving ALL of us down here. You have the absolute most amazing family in the entire world and they are needing some your unbelievable strength now more than ever.I will forever be believing you…
K.C. Monahan says:
October 1, 2008 at 11:33 am -
I find myself thinking of you more and more each day. Everything reminds me of you. This past couple of weeks, I swear I’ve seen 2 shooting stars. I don’t think I’ve seen 2 shooting stars in my entire life…that’s how I know that you’re up there watching over me and everyone who loves you. For the first shooting star sighting I was on my way to Maryland and rather frustrated as I had gotten off track and my GPS was of no assistance as it was “searching for satellites”. I was about to enter panic mode when suddenly I saw your star and I knew that you were there for me as you have been so many times before…thanks for that, I’m not sure that I would have made it without you! Sharon, Torey & T.J. I hope that you continue to find comfort in each other and know that Jacquie will continue to be your strength. Torey- I hope that you will finish Jacquie’s park and I know that she is there with you as you are speaking to her!
alicia says:
October 1, 2008 at 10:34 am -
my heart hurts when I am missing you so bad. So many things I want to tell you. I wish we could have you back. I hope you & my dad are taking care of each other up there, maybe he is teaching you some lacrosse moves, and you are teaching him the importance of Vera bags and Abercrombie tees. everything just seems to have lost its flavor without you… the sun doesn’t shine so bright anymore, the smell of fall isn’t as crisp, and music just doesn’t mean what it used to. i hope in time these things will return to the state that they once were… until then, please shine down on us beautiful girl… lord knows we have had some horrible days behind us and some very tough ones lay ahead. help us to be strong for ourselves and more importantly, strong for each other. it is almost unbearable being here without you, so keep on throwing us signs, don’t ever stop letting us know you are all around. TJ, Torey, Sharon, keep hanging in there. We love you guys so much. Just as Jacquie means the world to me, you all have come to mean the same. I am so grateful that I got to meet and befriend as wonderful people as you. Sharon, I have been having a really hard time dealing with this… I have been experiencing acute anxiety and even panic attacks (which I have never had before in my life). Since then I have started advanced pilates and yoga classes and have seem a dramatic improvement in my breathing and coping. I know yoga might sound silly and new age or what have you, but when you feel up to it (in weeks, months, heck even years) I really suggest trying it out… and if you want a buddy to do it with, you know I am only a text or a phone call away.Hang tight everyone, I love you all so much. And beautiful girl, god how I miss you. I am trying to hard to be good, to be patient with others, to not get upset by little things, to enjoy everything life has to offer (which includes the nuisances and bad days). But sometimes it is so hard, I just get so sad and mad. I miss you! I love you all and am BELIEVING<3 alicia <3
Pam L says:
October 1, 2008 at 8:09 am -
Sharon, Torey and TJ,Today like every single other day, I have started my day with a prayer and will say many more before the sun sets. Throughout the day, I think of you and hope that you are finding strength and that it doesn’t hurt just to breathe.
Natalie says:
October 1, 2008 at 6:52 am -
I am always and forver Believing. – Natalie Maranto
cmd says:
October 1, 2008 at 12:06 am -
Sharon, Torey, and TJ,There are no words. You are in my thoughts and prayer daily.
Sadie says:
September 30, 2008 at 11:31 pm -
Thinking of you every single second. I love you guys and am so glad we get to all be together this weekend. It will be hard and we will be angry (furious) and sad (devastated) and it is okay to feel all of those things. Jacquie was someone who always felt her feelings and allowed us in to feel them with her. She’d want us to feel our feelings too – and I know she is so proud of her amazing parents and brother. We will be there soon to lean on. I love you guys and I am always believing that Jacquie shows us that she is with us still.<3 Sadie
Janelle says:
September 30, 2008 at 11:16 pm -
I admire you all so much for your non-stop courage and belief… She seems like she was an amazing human being, and I feel affected because it’s so close to home. I am from Alden just 15 mins from williamsville and I want you to know I have donated blood every year! don’t stop believin <3 xoxo Janelle
Amanda Cavarella says:
September 30, 2008 at 11:01 pm -
Just letting you all know how much I think of you each day. Always loving and believing in you all. I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers everyday. love always, amanda
Elise Cusack & Family says:
September 30, 2008 at 10:42 pm -
Dearest Sharon, Torey & TJ ~ As I continue to faithfully read this beautiful website, I’m writing to you with absolutely no idea what to say… I just wanted you to know that my family and I continue to pray for you each and every day as you work so very hard to put one foot in front of the other… Don’t ever give up ~ you have way too many people counting on you! Just like Jacquie, we need you to keep teaching us… All our love ~ Elise, Martin, Quintin, Aidan, Gabriel & Fiona
Me says:
September 30, 2008 at 9:12 pm -
It’s not fair, it doesn’t seem possible. One year ago. Walking must have been so very difficult, but I know Jacquie was watching, looking down, and touching you with her heart. She is here with you, she is. We just want her here physically, and yes, it’s not fair that she isn’t. But look for signs of her presence, I do believe that there are signs. I’ve experienced this . Jax would want you to be happy and live, we all know this, but it’s hard to do right now. Take the time to feel her, grieve, experience both the happy and sad moments and reflect. Love is a gift, one that makes us all so very happy, fullfilled. Grief happens because we love. It is the hardest thing we go through but without it we wouldn’t have had all the wonderful aspects of love. So, each day we all must ride our own personal rollercoaster. With the healing nature of time, it will be possible to live in the way Jacquie would want you to! With so much love, understanding, Indie
Anonymous says:
September 30, 2008 at 9:03 pm -
Jaquie, I find myself constantly checking your site and thinking about you throughout the day. I still miss you and love you every single day….
Justine (best friend) says:
September 30, 2008 at 7:54 pm -
I guess I just first want to say how sorry I am that I have not written on Jacquies wall in a very long time. Truthfully it is not that I havent been reading it , its just that everytime I try to write something I burst out into uncontrollable tears. I have probably tried to write a message or a letter to Jacquie & family over a hundred times and would find myself staring at a blank screen. Even now it has been 15 minutes since I have started to type and still cannot gather my thoughts. I want to say a thousand things. I want to say how sorry I am to Sharon, Torey and T.J., I want to say how much I love and miss Jacquie and how there isnt a second that goes by that I dont think about her or wish that this was all a bad dream. But like I said on the 11th I have never been good with words and I dont expect to be now. Looking back on the last 3 weeks I guess everything didnt really didnt hit me until I came to Spain on the 14th. I had come to Buffalo so sudden on the 5th and I feel like my life from then until now is a huge cloud. I remember being there at the hospital and at every service and comprehending what was going on, but I guess I just didnt really understand what this all meant. I had lost my best friend, (although nothing like your relationship with her, Sharon) still someone who I had called my best friend for years. Someone who I trusted my entire heart with. Like many I presume I still cant believe that this is all true. My heart is broken into a thousand little pieces and I just cant see them coming back together. I had never lost someone close to me, ever. I had never felt this feeling before. This feeling of deep sadness that at times cripples me. I know that Jacquie would all want us to go on and live normal lives and to stop wasting so much time on her, but the fact is that Jacquie… you were our lives. You were a huge part of mine and of many others. You could never and will never be replaced. Life without you just doesnt seem real. Like Sharon, I too was not done making memories with you. We still had so many to make; going out, shopping, dancing the night away, chasing boys and finishing school together. We were even supposed to adopt kids together. Jax, being at school will never be the same. The sorority without you will never be the same. My life without you will never be the same. I hate that this happened and I know that I am supposed to learn and grow from this, but right now its just too hard. Its too hard to even let people know how I am feeling. I dont want to seem weak but I feel like if I dont let this out then I will just continue to get worse and worse. Jacquie, You were, are and will always be my teammate, my sister and my best friend. You were the reason why I joined the sorority and stayed at Geneseo. You made life sweet and comforting. You were the best friend that I was looking for and I hope that I was the one you had always wanted. I love you with all my heart and miss you more than I can say. love always, Justine
Kerri says:
September 30, 2008 at 2:51 pm -
Jacquie,It’s been just over a year now and our family has been turned upside down. This is killing each and everyone of us inside not having you here with us. I’ve been having such a hard time with everything. I don’t know how to stop thinking about you. I think about you constantly everyday…and there still hasn’t been a day that I haven’t cried. I don’t know how you stayed so strong because I can’t. I am so full of hatred right now! I hate the world for taking you away from us…I hate the time I won’t get to spend with you anymore…I hate the memories we won’t get to make in the future…I hate knowing that I didn’t get enough time with you to tell you just how much we all needed you and can’t do this without you…I hate that other people survived this stupid disease and you didn’t…I just hate everything right now and I don’t know if those feelings will ever go away. I want to see you and talk to you and hug you. I need you to tell me that you’re ok and that you’re still with us. Please give me a sign! I miss you sooooo much! There’s a part of me that truly believes that you’re still reading these messages, so when you get to this one, please consider visiting me to let me know you’re ok. Forever and always you are in my heart and in my thoughts! I love you so much! Love always,Cousin Kerri
sue says:
September 30, 2008 at 2:44 pm -
For all of us who were lucky enough to know Jacquie, we are forever changed. With all the pain being felt we should try to remember that it is only so bad because of the amazing person of jacquie hirsch. Is it really only one year ago? With what jax endured over the past 12 months that seems impossible. Sharon. torey and tj, my heart aches for you. Please let us help. Jax, I miss you and know that you need to help a lot of people down here who are suffering and missing you. I love you!
angela says:
September 30, 2008 at 2:29 pm -
dear jacquie, well im not sure but i think you said hi to me today! i was sitting at work minding my own buisness like i usually do, lol and a customer walked over to my window and i look up to see TINK!!! right in front of me spelled out large TINK….i really hope that was you saying hello to me! oh yea listen to this last nite i was bartending at dwyers and this guy came in with your braclet on….he said he sold a ton of them at some event at buffalo hills….you are everywhere and i miss you so much! i love you always sweet tink, cousin angela
Anonymous says:
September 30, 2008 at 11:12 am -
Hirsch Family, You are constantly in my thoughts and prayers. Jacquie was in several of my education classes at Geneseo and was a part of my group for one of our class projects. Her smile could light up the room and she brought such a positive energy to everything she was involved in. I’m sorry that there are no words I can say to console you at this time. Just know that you (Sharon, Torey, and TJ) and Jacquie are always on my mind. I still check the website every day hoping for updates to read. Please know that this website has helped me to cope with the loss of Jacquie (a little). Always on my mind and forever in my heart.
Michael Stoughton says:
September 30, 2008 at 9:47 am -
the sun rises out here in phx…today for whatever reason was very different…it had these red streaks that looked like a real sun burst…it was so different i had to look at it longer than normal… i will b e going to albuquerque this weekend to see sara and the kids…looking forward to seeing them… wish i had words for each of you, but i dont…i wish i did… peace to all the hirsches…
Anonymous says:
September 30, 2008 at 6:01 am -
You all have such courage and strength to walk in Jacquie’s footsteps and spread the love and caring that she showed to everyone she met. Torey you are strong and never falter as you give support to Sharon and TJ. Sharon you are the most couragous loving giving Mother. What an example you set for the world to see. Keeping you always in our prayers for continued courage and strength. Love Marcia
alicia says:
September 30, 2008 at 12:45 am -
just letting you know that i’m ALLways thinking of you, loving you, and BELIEVING in you.<3 delisha <3
Peggy LaGree says:
September 30, 2008 at 12:21 am -
Hirsch’s – It’s difficult to know what to say…except that you are all thought of in sympathy and friendship. We miss knowing that Jax’s is here with us – and try to find comfort in her presence above. I truly can’t imagine how difficult it is for you. You are in our prayers – for comfort and peace. With expressions of deepest sympathy – Peggy
Anonymous says:
September 29, 2008 at 10:31 pm -
I cant stop thinking about you. You are still the most amazing and influential people that I have ever come across. I wish you were still here. I miss your smile and your laugh and your insane ability to quote movies.Love you and forever thinking about you and all the things I have learned from you.xoxo
Another Jacquie fan says:
September 29, 2008 at 7:13 pm -
Believing and missing you Jacquie. Thinking about you and your family always.
missy says:
September 29, 2008 at 6:24 pm -
Dear Sharon Torey and TJ., Please know how much we are thinking of you all. How proud Jacquie must have been, to watch over you as you walked Friday night. I cant even begin to know the strength that took. Sharon, Tory , you are wonderful parents, T.J. a wonderful brother. Not only were you Blessed to have such an incredible daughter but she was also blessed to have such a wonderful family as yours. Sending strength and so, so much love . Believing Missy
Murphy’s says:
September 29, 2008 at 2:29 pm -
My family lived this hell and I understand all to well what you have gone through. Sully continues to fight everyday against this horrible disease and I will hold your daughters memory close to remind me that we can never lose sight of beating this. Your daughter and sister has also showed us that we must hold each other so close and love each other with everything we have.
christine seiders cornwell says:
September 29, 2008 at 11:27 am -
Sharon, I myself do not feel ready to go to the walk this Friday so I have no idea the amount of strenght that it took for you all to go. I know it must be hard to look around and see the survivors and think how come not Jacquie…But just think that she would want to make her dream live on and not be mad. I know how hard that is because when they told me I had cancer I was mad..really mad. Who has a baby one month and then the next month gets told they have cancer. One day we will be ready to go to those walks and help the cause and make things that we have gone though hopefully easier for the next person to go through. You may have had a gold ballon but Jacquie and her fight will always live on. Sharon stay strong and believe in the fact that Jacquie will guide you and you family. Please lean on WHO EVER OFFERS it is not a sign of weakness, take there love and compassion and allow others to hear your memories of Jacquie, just try it maybe it might help alittle…If not don’t do it again. Baby steps and belief in the inner strenght that we all have inside of us even at our darkest hour. I will continue to include you and your family in my prayers. Christine
Huer says:
September 29, 2008 at 9:23 am -
Sharon, Unable are the loved to die. For love is immortality. ~Emily Dickinson I can’t imagine how hard yesterday was for you. I think of Jacquie every single day, and yesterday I thought of her even more. I’ll never forget talking to Jacquie on 09/28/07. She was more concerned with how I was handling the news and how the rest of the girls would handle the news, then being upset. She always cared more about our well being then her own. The courage you showed by going to the Light the Night made Jacquie proud. The anger your feeling is normal, its hard to look at those happy people with their friends or daughters or sisters holding white balloons, while you were there holding a gold one. Cancer Stinks and isn’t fair. But your so strong and the fact that you got up to face those white balloons is amazing. Love you, always am believing. xoxo, Ashley
alicia says:
September 28, 2008 at 11:29 pm -
i am pretty sure that i think of writing on jac’s messageboard so much that i am convinced i wrote & posted messages and i go to see them and they’re not there.i love you all so much. a year ago today all of our lives were forever changed. one way that it forever changed all of us is that it made all of us stronger. i wish i had words to say to make you feel better. today is just a sh*tty d*mn day to say the least. i hate september 28th. but i love you all so much.and jacquie, you will allways be my hero, role model, and will be the love of my life!!!!!!!! no words to express what you mean to me.xoxoxo<3 alicia <3
aunt val says:
September 28, 2008 at 11:23 pm -
today…the 28th..the phone call and things changed forever. i believed from the beginning that you would beat this disease my dear girl, up until the end i believed you would be ok. i ache for you brother, your dad and your mom…for every one who loves you. we all will love you forever dear girl. aunt val
keesha says:
September 28, 2008 at 9:32 pm -
hi to all, i hope that you are having a good night, and supporting each other. this message is for sharon though. sharon you are one of the strongest women i know. and i do believe that jacquie is there with you every step of the way. stay strong, and let those of us who knew and loved her and know and love each of you help in any way we can. because i believe that is what jax would want each of us to do, and what i know she would do in anyone’s shoes. i remember the days where we were teaching summer camp and the fun you, her, TJ, and i had with the kids and all the stuff we used to do. and the day where we had the team girls line dance for 3 hours- and oh god how sore i was the next day. i also remember how you were always there for me, like my mom away from home, and how much i always appreciated everything you did for me. so i want to say thank you to each of you, you never know how much this “lost girl from downstate new york” appreciated all you have done for me through the years. there is no way to ever show my gratitude to each of you, torey, sharon, tj and jax. please let me know if there is anything i can do. i love you all, keesha
Anonymous says:
September 28, 2008 at 7:43 pm -
4-0!!! The Bills haven’t been 4-0 since 1992. I know you’re working your magic Tink!!! Miss you.
Sara (albuquerque) says:
September 28, 2008 at 6:38 pm -
TJ, I always love what you do with the website, even the smallest of changes are noticed and look great. You really have done an impressive job with it.Sharon and Torey, hello and hugs to you…Jacquie, missing you, thinking about you…Sue, once again I am with you. Did not have the theatre experience that you did but not too long ago Elise was sick with a temp and terrible sore throat etc.and as her mom I felt so badly for her and just wanted to make her better and I came downstairs in tears and said to my mom who was visiting…”my heart aches for her, she feels so bad and yet this is NOTHING compared to what Sharon and Jacquie have been going through” and just shook my head in a swirl of emotion about them and for them and still do, for the whole family. Love, Sara
Sadie says:
September 28, 2008 at 11:53 am -
One year ago today Jacquie began the fight of her life. Now we are honored to continue it for her forever. I’m thinking of you extra today – if that’s even possible as I think of you constantly. I love you guys and I know today is hard. Friday we will all be together fighting for Jacquie. Hold on to each other and we’ll be there soon to hold on to you too. Jacquie, we miss you so much. I keep replaying what you must have felt like one year ago and I am again amazed by your strength and courage. You have forever changed me and my life is better because you are in it. I love you. Thinking of all of you always, and of course, BELIEVING. <3 Sadie
Missy says:
September 28, 2008 at 10:48 am -
Dear Sharon , Hoping this day brings you the brightness of Jacquie’s smile, and the strength of everyone who loves and believes in you. Believing Missy
Cassey says:
September 28, 2008 at 1:35 am -
Not a day goes by that I do not think of all of you. I wish there was anything someone would say to make all this pain go away. Today will probably be even harder as it has now been a year since this horrible disease was found within Jacquie. I pray that she is giving you all strength every single day and making you smile :)All my love and thoughts,Cassey Stallman
sue says:
September 27, 2008 at 10:13 pm -
sharon, i am so proud of you for doing the walk. i really miss talking to you and hearing your voice so i will just continue to let you know that i am here and thinking of you (and jax, torey and tj). last night i took gia to a play and at the very end the lights go up and she turns to tell me that she doesn’t feel well. she then proceeded to throw up all over the auditorium seat, herself and me. as we were driving home, she says “mom, why can’t God use his power so that i am not sick?’’ (she is 5) once again, i had no answer. will we ever? she broke my heart as she spent the night sick about 7 more times and i can not even imagine the strength you had for jax over the last year. you are amazing! i love you
Moo says:
September 27, 2008 at 8:35 pm -
Dear Aunt Sharon:I can’t thank you enough for the letter you wrote to me and the girls. I know that wasn’t an easy thing to do. Just as you feel, I also find it so hard to find the right words to say. If there really are any at all?! I do believe that writing them does make it a little easier. I can’t imagine how you must feel, TJ and Uncle Torey, too. I know first hand, I saw it with my own two eyes, as did everyone else, the incredible bond that you and Jax shared together…and always will! Nothing can take that away from you. I miss her, too. A LOT! Not a day, not even a minute, goes by that I don’t think about her or a memory that I have with her. There are countless numbers of them. And they all make me smile, cuz that’s what Jacquie did best…make others smile and laugh. Everywhere I look, songs on the radio, the word “believe” seems to beeverywhere…Jax is still here with us everyday! She just appears a little different now, but that doesn’t mean that we still can’t talk to her or joke with her. I do everyday. I laugh with her, I cry with her, etc. I know she can hear me and she’s showed me that she hears me, too! You are truly an inspiration and Jacquie would be so proud of you! It is going to take a long time to heal, if ever, but our precious Tink is resting peacefully and watching over each of us. Her love and spirit will live in us all forever. I love you all so much and I am here for you if you need anything. Keep BELIEVING!!!
Amanda Cavarella says:
September 27, 2008 at 5:21 pm -
Just saying hi and letting you know I am thinking of you all. I BELIEVE. Love, Amanda
Krystal says:
September 27, 2008 at 2:51 pm -
Jacquie, It’s been a year today since I physically saw you, but I wanted you to know that I see your smiling face daily. I know you’re smiling down on us and probably cracking jokes about all the things happening here… Do you think the Bills can go 4-0 tomorrow??? Love you.
Megan Dressel says:
September 27, 2008 at 8:15 am -
just wanted to let you know i love you, and that i still believe.hey jax- someone was wearing a tinkerbell shirt the other day in school. i almost started to cry, but then i realized how tinkerbell is always smiling, just like you, and that made me happy 🙂 miss you and love you.
Amanda Cavarella says:
September 26, 2008 at 8:19 pm -
Hirsch’s, You are all in my thoughts and prayers everyday. I think about you all the time, and pray that Jacquie is giving you strength. My heart just aches for you all right now..please know I am here for you all and if you need anything do not hesitate. I know “the girls” and I are looking forward to the walk next weekend and seeing all you again. I love you all and keep you in my heart. Jacquie-I miss you and love you very much. I will keep you in my heart forever. I think about you and your family each and every day. I BELIEVE <3 Love always, Amanda
missy says:
September 26, 2008 at 7:07 pm -
Dear Sharon Tory and T.J., I will be thinking of you as you walk tonight and I believe with all my heart Jacquie will be walking right beside you. All my strength and love. Missy
Amanda Parisi says:
September 26, 2008 at 7:00 pm -
I’m thinking of your family and missing Jax everyday. Stay strong.
Michael Stoughton says:
September 26, 2008 at 4:40 pm -
i think we need a laugh… i am in a construction trailer out here in az…the phone is hooked up and i get those telemarketers calling…your factory warranty is up…do you want digital cable…youve won a trip on a cruise line etc…can i speak to jerry anderson?… so i hang up or tell them this is a jobsite trailer on a construction site… the other day this happens…. angelone builders this is mike… can i speak to trailer jobsite? excuse me? can i speak to mr trailer jobsite? this is a construction trailer at a construction jobsite… thats what it says for first and last name, trailer jobsite…are you over 21 and would you be interested in the promotion for the legacy resort? i know she has a job that must be so horrible to ask those questions all day, but she really thought i was named trailer jobsite…think of this…someone had to type that name in at some point…last name, jobsite…first name, trailer its not as funny when i type it out but still funny i guess… i see jacquie calling me trailer from now on… peace to all
alicia says:
September 26, 2008 at 4:32 pm -
I’m sorry I can’t be at Light the Night with you in Roch today, but know I am with you in spirit, and will be physically present with you next week!Hang in there Sharon… and it is okay if you cry at the walk, there will be tons of people right beside you, with their hands waiting in case you need one to hold tight and squeeze. And can I just say how proud I am of you for getting out of the house and doing this walk? That takes a lot of guts, courage, and grace… and there is no doubt that beautiful Jacquie is looking down with her illuminating smile, so proud of you. You are doing so well, being so strong. I love you!<3 alicia <3
Sara (albuquerque) says:
September 26, 2008 at 3:50 pm -
Hi Sharon, Just had to say from the moment I met you so long ago, I thought you were an awesome human being, I still think you are just so amazing inside and out!! Sara
Sara (albuquerque) says:
September 26, 2008 at 12:51 pm -
Just saying hello. Today the sadness is back on the surface, ready to pour out. It was last night too. Sue, I am with you…if our sadness and pain is what it is for us, I can not even beigin to imagine how it is for Sharon, Torey, TJ and the rest of the family. I know this is one of those things I will never understand and never be able to make sense of and will always have sadness along with the happy memories and thoughts. I have said this before to my mom- how lucky I am to have known someone that saying goodbye to can be so hard. Hugs to you Sharon! Love, Sara
alicia says:
September 26, 2008 at 11:37 am -
TJ, I googled that song that you heard on the radio and it is called “Hoe Down” from “Four Dance Episodes” from “Rodeo” written by Aaron Copland. I went to youtube and this is the best version I found: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cqah1rucyRgI’m listening to it right now at work and am loving every second of it. Jacquie was guiding you home last night, trying to ensure that you ate a deliciously yummy dinner!she is ALL around.i love you guys so much.xoxoxo <3 alicia <3 xoxoxoxoxo
Kathy says:
September 26, 2008 at 11:33 am -